There must be an answer

New direction for the blog

2009-07-30T21:54:00.002+01:00

Grrr... iGoogle blogger app just wiped my post!

So I'll keep this brief as I've already written it once.

Having an irrational fear is very annoying. Unfortunately irrational fears are part of life. (especially if you have aspergers!)

Family has invaded my facebook and in my mind I feel, (for want of a better way to describe it) compromised. So I'm taking action to manage my insanity. As a result I'm going to be posting all the microblog messages I used to post on there on here. Expect shorter and more regular posts on a broader range of interests and lots of links to stuff that's peaked my interest!

D0n't like being put in the situation where I have to chose whether to block my family or block my friends and colleagues. But that's the situation I'm faced with and no matter how I try and explain to my family, the message isn't getting through. So, if they ever find this. Sorry!

Microblog posts won't have the colours of graphics, but they will be more frequent!

Take care

Ryan

Cool Asperger Vid

2009-07-30T21:41:00.001+01:00

http://www.aane.org/about_aane/aane_video_gallery.html

How long would you wear the same pair of underwear?

2009-07-30T21:26:00.001+01:00

Just read this article about a new invention meaning you can wear the same pair for a month. Yes A MONTH! Granted this is designed for space, but it's only a matter of time before someone makes a retail version. I would imagine aimed at college and university students?? Probably have military applications as well. There isn't always a laundrette close enough to your battlefield. Personally, no matter how good it is. It would still creep me out a bit.

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5g8gpZRl3t8mV2RxsVjIuPU75dJeAD99OURDO2

How do you make DIY more fun?

2009-06-21T23:37:00.002+01:00

I know what you're thinking.... MORE FUN?? No.. that's simply not possible! I'm sure you spend many hours putting the Blue Peter training to good use with your love of DIY all day long.

If you've sucessfully left your Tracy Island obsession well behind you and now avoid even watching 'Home Improvement' shows because it all looks too much like hard work. Then this post is really for you!

My DIY ventures have really been few and far between and in the tradition of British building, start late, end even later, are a bit 'fudged' around the edges and need to be torn down in a few years and done properly. Add in a healthy dose of... hmm... I'll have a cup of tea first.

A prime example of this is my 'floating' shelf from IKEA. Which whilst it was floating...was also tilting. As it was above the sofa, this lead to many guests pointing out concerns that it was clearly on the verge of collapse and opting to stand rather than sit. You'll be pleased to know that this was eventually corrected and is now a perfectly level floating shelf with screws so F^&king big, if that thing goes, it's taking the WHOLE WALL WITH IT!!

So this week I was faced with another DIY dilema. LCD monitor bracket (well I say this week.. I actually I got the bracket a few weeks ago.. got it out of it's packaging. Admired it and then promptly put it down). This was a mistake on multiple levels as for the life of my I can't find the screws that came with it!

Deciding this week that I really did need to try and put it up I decided to pull on the wisdom of crass stereotypes of builders. What did they have, that I didn't. The answer was staring my in the face the whole time. BEER!

Beer is a miracle of invention. Armed with a couple of beers (no more than that of course, I'm not totally crazy!) I was now very confident that I could easily attach the bracket and not having the screws would in no way impeed my drilling skills!

Amazingly I'm still alive, the bracket is up! A feet of engineering genius that I was and am incredibly proud of! (I was sure it would have fallen down by now!)

So the moral of the story is. Bob the builder's gotta be plastered!! I mean his trucks and things are talking to him and singing! No wonder he thinks he can fix everything!!!

What to do if you don't have an egg cup?

2009-06-20T23:02:00.004+01:00

My student days are well behind me, but I've never really been inspired by cooking. Whilst I do make a pretty mean beans on toast and in extreme circumstances have managed several full Sunday Roasts. I realised the other day I'd never boiled an egg. Shocking I know! (... well.. not that shocking really?)

So I bought some eggs, dug out my old 'Student Cookbook' and set out on a voyage of discovery!!
(Fade to horizon and bring up inspiring music!)

Yeap.. boil, then keep hot for 3 minutes. Even I managed that one, although I did have to use my mobile phone to measure the three minutes. But THEN HORROR!!!

I managed to get the eggs successfully out of the pan only to realise I had no egg cups. What was I supposed to do!! You can't eat boiled egg and soldiers without an egg cup (not on principle, but simply practically).

There was an unlikely saviour. Which you shouldn't be too shocked to discover considering there's a big photo of them on the blog. (So really I should just stop writing now).

For anyone who can't see the photo. Shot Glasses! Genius! I don't see why anyone would bother with egg cups when you can use shot glasses.

Mine are similar to the photo but they say. "Hey there, so you swallow?" and "I do what the voices in my head tell me too". I think both are very profound statements that we can learn a lot from for generations to come!

P.S. I've turned my back on Facebook. There just isn't the restrictions you need on it. I don't want conversations from my family being read by my friends and am sick of having to censor what I'm saying to my friends because of my family. Time for a clean break before I go crazy! Hopefully this will mean I'm posting a lot more on here!!

What is Identity?

2009-05-25T12:40:00.009+01:00

Hello

I've been wondering about identity. What makes me, me and you, you?

Philosophy says: -

identity is whatever makes something the same or different.

Sociology says: -

an individuals comprehension of him or herself as a discrete, separate entity.

In fact the more I look into this the more I realise no one has a definitive description of identity. Everyone approaching the question from their own perspective and experiences. So, what goes into our identity? Are we born with it? Is it our soul? Our DNA? Our life experiences? Is it what we mean to others? Is it what we do? Is it all of these things?

I'm sure we've all heard people day "I'm not the same person I was X years ago, I've changed." So, lets assume that identity, primarily our self identity is flexible. Is it identity chosen by us then?

Three main factors of identity

1. DNA - Our building blocks, mapping out what we will look like, what our brain's capabilities will do.

2. Social Impact - Learnt behaviour, socially accepted norms, psychological development etc.

3. Personal Will - Our ability to take control of our naturally born attributes and our learnt behaviour and change them. Learn more, change our behaviours use or disregard any biological characteristics.

All three components are intrinsically interwoven.

(Ok, so you're probably thinking DNA doesn't change. Well. yes, DNA doesn't. But we do change what we do with our DNA. I used to love swimming, I could be genetically predisposed to being a fantastic swimmer. But I haven''t been swimming for years. The DNA is the same but it's relevance is questionable. You may have brown hair but dye it blond. DNA is massive, but it's impact on identity is derived by personal will, social impact and yes, DNA. One DNA characteristic counteracting another. I'm great with three dimensional strategy, I can anticipate what a footballer will do when he's heading towards me in a football game, I can plan how best to stop them. I can train my body to have the physical capabilities to stop them. All influenced by DNA. But I have a hypersensitivity to pain and my social awkwardness makes it difficult interacting on a team. Both caused by DNA. So I don't play football.)

So, how do we identify our self?

Photo's - DNA
Names - Social
Our jobs - Personal will

When introducing yourself to someone else you cover all of these three characteristics and probably don't realise it. We all identify ourselves on these three levels.

Which one is stronger? hmmm..... all of them are strong. All of them balance each other.

Your personal will, will only go so far before social pressures or physical limitations kick in.
Your social role is limited by your physical attractiveness and capabilities as well as your willingness to interact with society.
Your physical characteristics are limited by your desire to act upon them. Social influences and personal will impact our diet, exercise, what products we use, what skills we develop. (For an odd example, I may be genetically predisposed to being a fantastic psychopath. But society would not approve, I've learnt that it's bad and I personally don't want to do it.)

How do you define the identities of those around you? Is our identity purely what people perceive of us?

Our brains store a catalogue of people in our minds. We need to define each one as differant in order to interact with them. So we define that person's identity for them and treat them accordingly.

Even if you are married to someone you can't know their whole identity, it's to complex. So we generalise. We use stereotypes. We track common characteristics of people with similar details and build up a picture of their identity in our minds.

Recently there has been outrage at bankers for loosing all the money. If we see a banker we automatically assume now that they are money hungry, risk taking valueless people. Without even meeting someone you have defined someones personal will identity as uncaring. You've defined their social identity as being corrupted, they've learnt the wrong lessons, their parents must have done this to them. And you've defined their DNA.. "I bet they have a small penis." "They were bad at sports at school so they're making up for it now."

So, in reality, identity is both something so massive and personal that no one can ever understand. AND something someone can define you as, without knowing you at all.

Which I think it why it makes it so hard to define exactly what we mean by identity. The word is imprecise. The way others perceive your identity is uncontrollable. So if you say identity is what makes you the same or different, it depends on who's actually making that decision. If I was a banker I'd be the same as all the other bankers. But if I'm your child I'm unique. If I'm your child and a banker then the credit crunch is automatically my fault, but you forgive me for it and start telling the neighbours that you were the only one who predicted it and tried to stop the madness. The one good banker!

Identity then has two perspectives. Self identity and Social identity.

Self identity is what you define yourself as. Ironically most people define themselves as whatever their social identity is. So let's look at social identity.

Social identity is defined as how others see you. Social identity is based on such little information it can be easily manipulated like the mother above telling the neighbours about the valiant struggles of her son to stop the credit crunch. Or advertising on television.

When people pick a career they want to go into, they typically are using their personal will to pick the social identity they want. Therefore someone saying "My son's a doctor" you might jump to "is he cute/married?" On the other hand "My son's a Republican senator", I'd probably just politely walk away.

Personal will is influenced by social and DNA so you assume the doctor is smart and has been raised well. That he's passionate, caring and rich.

The Republican senator is also smart, more than likely rich. But you automatically question his upbringing or his caring nature. Maybe the mothers overprotective and the father abusive. (At least you do if you're a Democrat. Sorry Republicans, that's how you are perceived.)

Coming back to self identity. If it's so infuenced by social identity. Then is the self identity the weaker of the two aspects? Or because our self identity influences our social identity so much is self identity the stronger?

Most people live their lives trying to understand their self identity at the same time they try and control their social identity. We all want to be liked. We want our identity to be something people like. We judge our own success based on how others percieve us. So the two identities are both important. Everyone weighs the two differantly.

The people who are nervous and the people who are confident. The balance I think largely relates to how they balance their self and social identities. Nervous people value social identity more, they are more likely to view themselves and thier accompishments through the eyes of others. They worry more about how they are seen in society. Confident people are more likely to value their personal identity more than their social identity. They do what they feel is best suited to their own beliefs and how they define themselves.

Whether we favour social identity or self identity is also an aspect of our identity. It is influenced by what we've learn't, personal will of how it affects us and is influenced by our DNA. Natrually attractive people tend to value that attractiveness less than someone who isn't attractive. The DNA making them attractive, plus social impact and perception of that attractiveness giving them confidence, helps define their view of the world and their personal will.

Those of us with a poor perception of our social identity, worry about our social identity. Those with a good social identity tend to worry more about their personal identity. They complain that they're idea's aren't taken seriously because they're cute. Their social identity, whilst being positive, compromises thier personal identity and that's what they're more concerned about.

This seems to lead to a self fulfilling policy and moral of the story, but which one.

Be true to yourself and you'll be happy?
If you focus on pretending to be good then people will think you are and therefore you'll be good?

I've always focused on the top one. I have strong personal values, although I am nervous. But the second one, although it seems odd, seems to be the key to happiness. Can faking our identity really be the right thing to do to make us happy?

What do you think?

Will Britain become a fascist state?

2009-05-21T19:13:00.004+01:00

So I've mentioned it before. Economic downturn typically means right wing politics. I'm really glad the US is on a sensible left wing politics. But I'm a little worried about the UK.

Our extremist party (think KKK genetically bred with a right wing republican) is the BNP British National Party (formally the National Front).

They've donned thier suits and they're talking to the deprived, under educated and hard done by. Planting the seed of hated and resentment. But why does it work? Well.. it offers a solution to people who feel there is no solution.

Sure it's a really shite solution and doesn't actually work, but you'd be amazed how easily people fall for those types of solutions.

Being an asperger people, I tend to analyse everything rather than go with the flock which is why I'm normally a Liberal Democrat voter. But I can kind of see why some people would see fascism as being 'cool'. In our hearts we all have the tibal instincts of them and us. Granted I would never apply this to skin colour, disability, sexual orientation, gender etc etc.

But if your waiting to go into a nightclub and someone walks up and says... your special.. you should come right through. You'd probably like that person. I think that's why this type of polictics is so effective. It seperates people out as better and if you're in the 'special' group I would imagine it feels pretty good. Having never been in a special group I'm not really sure. But I often wanted to be in the cool gang at school. I guess this is just a really big 'cool' gang, that's dangerous and doesn't listen to what the teacher/morality tells them to do.

SO... canI see Britain dramatically turning to the right... probably not. (thank god!) I'd love to say this was because we're all very moral, or we've evolved beyond such petty interests. This may be true for some.. but for others it's just plain financial sense. We're in a global economy, we need to work with people who are in all groups if we are going to work and prosper. There's no point getting in a club infront of others if the clubs shite and you can't afford to buy any beer.

It makes more sense to go wait in a queue for a better club that you can afford an that's packed with people having a great time.. together.

So.. why today's rant? I've just had a flyer through from the BNP. They want no EU, no immigration, british jobs for british people and my favorite quote. "Because it's not racist to oppose mass immigration and polictical correctnesss - it's common sense!"

First of all... their flier said NO immigration. Not limited and controlled immigration, whereby we attract the best talent from around the world to help support jobs here, but draw the limit at being a charity to all and sundry.

And apposing political correctness...wikipedia says Political correctness is

"a term applied to language, ideas, policies, or behavior seen by some as seeking to minimize offense to gender, racial, cultural, disabled, aged or other identity groups."

So... if you oppose minimising offense.. you support maximising offense... in areas including race... making you a.... racist.

Logic.. intelligence and a bit of integrity really doesn't go with the job description of a fascist I guess.

Now.. if they'd of said "it's not racist to question why some councils spend many thousands of pounds defining policitcal correctness language guides for their staff, whilst common sense should be sufficient and the money could be better spent." Then ok. I'd be ok with that as a statement. But that's not what they're saying. That's just what they hope some people will read into it at the same time they know others will take it to it's other extreme.... "I want that job so I'll just go kill them."

The odd thing is.. we have soo many people on benefits that just won't do some jobs. They'd rather stay on benefit. British people turning down British jobs. Maybe I'm mis reading the principle of british jobs for british people... maybe it should be. Fantastically well paid jobs for fuck heads..... yes.. I think that's what it's hidden meaning is. Little did they know there were lots of these jobs going in the banks.

Ok ranting over for a while. Just got Supernatural Season 3 part one to cheer me up.

How bad does a bad day at work have to be before you quit?

2009-05-21T18:48:00.002+01:00

Hello

I miss the days when I would enjoy going to work. Sure, it was busy, but I felt like I was achieving something and helping people.

Nowerdays... it's all politics. All back stabbing. People talking down to me like I'm 5 has replaced the respect I once had and I don't think I've done anything to deserve it.

I'm ranting on here after a particularly bad day at work in the hope the I get it out of my system ready for a challenging day tomorrow.

Those were the days... 18 months ago I was managing a team, responsible for my own projects. Respected and listened to by my peers and managers. Delivering a cool new solution out of existing technology that no one had ever thought of before.

Then I got promoted. Surely a suitable reward for my sucesses, but when is a promotion not a promotion? Well, can't argue about salary really and I've got a pretty good job title. But all my responsibilities have been taken away. I now report to someone more junior than I did before I was promoted and my good ideas either fall on deaf ears or are quickly stolen by colleagues and passed off as their ideas. Can these things really be seen as signs that I have arrived? Should I bite back as much as they do? Well.. I've tried a few times and ended up getting bollocked for it. Seems to be a loose loose situation. I've never been good at being manipulative, self centred and brutal. I had thought that was a good thing. But I just don't know anymore.

I love solving problems but the only solution I can think of is leaving, except I can't do that because there aren't any jobs out there.

So, as I'm writting this down... let's analyse it. Ok so, key things we need to be happy are... (borrowed from http://www.hgi.org.uk/archive/human-givens.htm)

Security — safe territory and an environment which allows us to develop fully
Attention (to give and receive it) — a form of nutrition
Sense of autonomy and control — having volition to make responsible choices
Being emotionally connected to others
Feeling part of a wider community
Friendship, intimacy — to know that at least one other person accepts us totally for who we are, “warts 'n' all”
Privacy — opportunity to reflect and consolidate experience
Sense of status within social groupings
Sense of competence and achievement
Meaning and purpose — which come from being stretched in what we do and think.

1. Don't really feel that safe there...

2. I think this means positive attention.. no I think some people would rather I just went away.

3. No... I have some autonomy, but no where near what I'm used to having.

4. Again I think this means positve emotion. Hmm.. a few people.

5. Part of wider community, depends whether you class clicky groups as a community?

6. Hmm... I just don't know who my friends are anymore.

7. I guess I have this.

8. Status... stripped and castrated of this. Definitly an issue.

9. I feel that I have a lot to offer, but others lack of confidence is contagious. Like swine flu!

10. Stretched in how far I can go without throwing things doesn't really count does it? Without a project I can contribute to I don't feel like my role has any meaning or purpose. Lost and forgotten...

Hmm... well... I don't think that really helped anything.....

I'm going to have to muster all the confidence I have and go in assertive... I figure I've been sidelined enough, if I'm going down I'm going down fighting!!! At this point I don't really see as I have anything to loose.

God, writting a blog should only really be done when happy I think.

I'm fucked! hmm.. maybe alcohol is the answer. The huge bar of chocolate I went through earlier didn't really help.

Am I a Superhero?

2009-05-06T04:11:00.005+01:00

Hello!

My brain's gone into full scale overload. Running through my entire life, picking up the clues, reanalysing conversations and situations. Lost partners and friends.

When I was getting ready to go to work today I decided that I'd do a blog linking myself to superheroes. Or really, linking some of the themes of comics to how I felt. It's difficult to really understand what having Aspergers is. There aren't really any role models out there. That would explain my need to find characters that exibited some of the signs.

So I was having a shower and decided that I was like Neo. I'd taken the blue pill and woken up from the matrix. I was Hiro in Heroes when he discovers that he can stop time and now I can use my powers for good. I was like Clark Kent (from the films) socially awkward, not quite getting it and being seen as 'special' by work colleagues, but secretly having my superpower... the power to compulsively over analyse anything! I am "Analyst Boy!!".... (I'm sooo.. SCREWED!! LOL!)

For a brief time it was exilerating. The possibilities... endless!

But I don't feel like a superhero anymore.

So, let's check off the process for accepting change....

1) DENIAL - Yeah, had that for years.

2) ANGER - I think I just hit that one.

3) BARGAINING - This one seems a little too irrational for me. I'll let you know if I hit it though!

4) DEPRESSION - Actually no. I think I've come out of my depression since finding out. Now that I know I feel like I can start to forgive myself for some of the stupid things that I have done.

5) ACCEPTANCE - They say you can go through the steps in a variety of orders, but I think I started with this one... and I'm working backwards. (That's odd, right??)

The biggest problem I have is coming to terms with.. well.. probably having to act throughout the rest of my life. I didn't realise I did it before, I thought everyone did. I thought it was normal but that I was bad at it. What I mean by act, it's that I'm lying to people. It's more... ok imagine your in a play with Matt Damon or Halle Berry. You want to just run up to them and get thier autograph, or snog them or something. But you know you can't. That that would be wrong. Everyone's looking at you and you have the lines you need to say and the actions you need to do. It's been preplanned and memorised. Your a professional and you don't really have a choice so you act.

Honesty is very important, but if I said the things that came into my head I know I would hurt people. I have to filter a lot of it out. Phase things differantly. Censor myself. Even if I had the best intentions of what I wanted to say, that I thought it might help them. If I do say it it often makes things worse. Or I'm seen as cold and heartless.

"Empathy is the capability to share your feelings and understand another's emotion and feelings. It is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes," or in some way experience what the other person is feeling"

Aspergers is often characterised as having a lack of empathy. I think this is a bit of an over generalisation. So, lets break it down. (God that's SUCH an aspie thing to do)

1. Share feelings - If a friend breaks up with their partner, I have sympathy for them. But I don't get upset myself that they've split up. I wasn't in the relationship. I haven't lost them. So I can't/don't experience the loss they do.

2. Understand anothers feelings - I do understand them, I understand them from my perspective, when I've had breakups. I've read loads on psychology and observed people's behavious so I can understand it from a technical perspective. (That's a little off target isn't it?)

3. Put oneself into another's shoes - I can do this really well.. so typically the advice I give is what I would do. But what I would do is not what most people would do. So I tend to screw up there. I can offer advice I've seen on TV, or read in a book. Or (and I have done this before) quote the 5 steps above to them. Convinced that my experience and understanding will help them. Sometimes it does. I think it comes across as proactive. Sometimes it doesn't and it comes across like I'm insensitive to what they're going through. (I guess I am in a way)

4. Experience what others are feeling - Not really. I can think about when something similar happened to me and remember how I felt. But it's often not the same and what they are feeling.

Right now.. I can't sleep. It's 5 am. I have to be up in 3 hours and I can't sleep.

I keep coming back to the thought that I've lost ignorance of the problem and with it hope that it would ever go away. Hope that I will ever be normal. (Sounds like step 4.. depression!)

On that wonderfully optomistic note. I'm going to try and get some sleep again.

Night!

Ryan

What am I? Why do I do the things that I do?

2009-05-04T00:03:00.012+01:00

Hello

Wow! The last week has been crazy. Really crazy. As I mentioned in my last post, I haven't been feeling too great. I've been trying to analyze what the problem could be. I'm at a point in my life where I need to make sense of a lot of things. I'm not really a social type of person, it can be difficult for me to feel ike I fit in to situations. Small talk is difficult, I prefer to talk about the big important things. I can get carried away thinking and analyzing certain subjects and situations, hence this blog.

It's weird going through life knowing I'm differant to other people. I thought this was just because I was bi, but even in the gay community I know I'm differant. But I've never really known why. I get on best with people that are also seen as differant, don't know why, just always have.

I have a clear idea in my head of right and wrong. I try very hard to get social situations right. To say the right thing. Work out why people do what they do and where I fit in with everything. When I started this blog I wanted it to be called something that was true to me. The side of my I tend to keep hidden. The same applies to my profile.

The last few weeks have been a real trip through the looking glass into who I am. Drudging up my past trying to find an answer. Trying to work out why certain things have gone wrong. Writting all of it down on this blog has helped filter my thoughts and although the vast majority of this I haven't posted. It has been helpful. But I needed something more. Researching psychology doesn't make me an expert in it. So I went to a qualified therapist.

That was a week ago and that's why things are so crazy since then. I have my diagnosis. I now know. I know why I am who I am.

It's weird these profound pieces of information you get. I find it hard to describe. The best I can come up with is this. My life has been like trying to put together a jigsaw puzzle, when I was young, I was working in the dark, by myself. Over the years it's gotten lighter as I've learnt more, seen more and had more contact with people. But I never knew what the picture on the jigsaw was, so it was still difficult to make any sense of it. Right now I feel like someone's given me that picture. Suddenly over the last week, pieces are just falling into place. Everything makes more sense. The jigsaw is far from finished it won't be finished until the day I die. But I have hope again. Having the picture is what I needed to put things in perspective and give me hope.

You might be wondering what I have that could have such a profound effect on me. Well. I have Asperger Syndrome.

What's that?

Asperger Syndrome seems to be the syndrome that's seen but not spoken of. Possibly because it was only defined 10 years ago. But with 1 in 150 people who have it and countless characters on TV that are shown to have it I'm amazed that whilst I liked a lot of the characters, I had no idea what they had in common.

Just a few examples of TV and Film characters likely to be inspired by Aspergers (if not a perfect match): -

Basil Faulty - Faulty Towers
Gus Hedgers - Drop the dead donkey
Sheldon - The Big Bang Theory
Arnold Rimmer - Red Dwarf
Data, Spock, Reg Barclay, Dr Julian Bashir and The Doctor (Voyager), Seven of Nine - Star Trek
Lisa Simpson - The Simpsons
Cliff Clavin - Cheers
Michelle (bandcamp girl) - American Pie
Most of the characters - Third Rock from the Sun
Dr Daniel Jackson - Stargate (film, not TV serise so much)
Dr. McKay - Stargate Atlantis
Chloe O'Brian (loyal to Jack Bauer) - 24
Reg Hollis - The Bill
Mork from Orson - Mork and Mindy
Benton Fraser - Due South
Brennan and Zack - Bones
Moss - The IT Crowd
Rocko - Rocko's Modern Life
Brain - Pinky and the Brain
Jerry Espenson - Boston Legal
Gil Grissom and Hodges - CSI
Dr House - House
Neo - The Matrix (Something about this line that's always resonated with me. Now I know why. Morpheus: "What you know you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad." )
The Thermians - GalaxyQuest
Lt. Felix Gaeta - Battlestar Galactica
Clark Kent - Superman
"Doc" Emmett Brown - Back To The Future
The Lone Gunmen - X-Files
Velma from Scooby-Doo
Willow - Buffy
C-3PO from Star Wars
Erica Hahn - Grey's Anatomy
Bridget Jones - Bridget Jones Diary
Niles Crane - Fraiser

I also need to mention the book "The Positronic Man" - Issac Asimov. One of my ex's said I was like the robot in the story... over 10 years ago. Turns out Issac had Aspergers and was likely drawing on that to create the character.

Most medical descrptions of the thing don't really help, I think to get a feel for what it actually is. But here's one anyway.

http://www.brainskills.co.uk/WhatIsAspergersSyndrome.html

Asperger Syndrome can be very difficult to identify as the symtoms can show in a variety of ways and once a person reaches adulthood they will typically have mastered a range of skills that hide how they are, a filter between what their brain thinks and what comes out of their mouth. A filter between themselves and those around them so they can better fit in.

Conclusion

The moral of the story is, if you believe there is an answer. There probably is, you just don't know it yet. It can be a difficult struggle to find your answer and it may take many years. But it's out there and when you are ready to know, you've got to try everything you can to find it. Because it's truely life changing.

What next?

Well.. as I only get about one hit a week and I now have my answer, I was thinking about shutting the blog down. But really, despite immersing myself in all things Aspergers in the last week, I've got a long way to really understand what this means for me and I think writting on here will help. *hopefully*

I really need to go to bed now it's 2.30AM here. But I'm quite puzzled by not only the number of references to Aspergers people, but also the fact that it's never really discussed. It's also interesting that it's these specific types of characters that are seen as the popular characters. I realise there is a big problem with undiagnosed Aspie's, but just how many do you think are out there? I've also noticed just how aspie a number of my friends are.

Not to mention my dilema of how to act? Tell everyone and risk being seen as disabled. Hide it. How to manage my friends who I'm sure are also aspie, tell them or not? All this and more I hope to blog on as it's certainly my latest compulsion.

Are we destined to re-live our childhood?

2009-04-23T23:15:00.005+01:00

Hey!

I think about the people in my life and the more I know about their childhood, I can't stop myself from seeing the links between their experiences and the way they act now they are an adult.

What they are scared of, who they fancy, the friends they make and the careers they live.

They are still striving to over come and seek attention of emotionally or physically distant parents. They are looking to achieve their childhood dreams. Those with loving parents seem to quickly find thier 'one' and settle down. Where as the ones who have the hardest time growing up cling to their partners like their lives depend on them.

Those who strive desperately for career sucess over everything else, are they doing it for the money, the love of the job, or are they trying to plug a whole in themselves.

So, is this simple psychology? Is it destined? Fate? Or do those who don't learn their lessons are destined to repeat them?

You have to wonder some times whether you can truely over come your past and choose your future. Truely move on, change and be someone differant.

I was watching Grey's Anatomy recently and one of the characters said "the scars you pick up make you who you are, they make you extrodinary" (or something along those lines)

I have to agree, some challenges we face can make us stronger. They test us and we can come out of these situations with a validation of our own strength.

But what if the challenges we face overwhelm us? the scars too deep that they will never heal? Can we adapt? Can we overcome? Can we be something more than what we were?

I think we all hope so. I think it's the scariest thing in the world to think we might not, ever change. That we might never be whole, be better. But a life driven in fear that we might not change never seems to be a happy one. I can see that all around me. People making choices based on fear.

I find it difficult to see anyone make a decision based on hope. Maybe I'm to cynical. Maybe I'm not seeing the big picture. Maybe we see people who live on this hope as the crazy ones, the ones that take what we think are irrational risks.

So, are we destined to re-live our childhood? Our childhood provides us with our template, how to live, how to act, how to interact with people. Lessons once learnt are hard to break. On some level we all seek that memory of happiness from our past.

I have to believe that we can change. I don't think that our childhood will ever stop influencing how we see the world. But we can choose how we act on that world view. There is always something more real than the past, there is always something greater than the present, the future. It's important to see it as a blank canvas. The paints may be prepicked, but we decide on the picture we paint. We own our minds and our bodies, we are in control, if we choose to be.

What do you think??

Ryan

Why understand psychology?

2009-04-14T00:00:00.005+01:00

Hello

Sorry I haven't posted for a while I've been writting lots of posts about some memories that I've recovered, fears, phobias sleep deprevation etc. But they are all a little too... hmm.. real to post right now. So I thought I'd post something a little more abstract.

It occured to me that psychology is like cars.

Let me explain.

1. What is it? Imagine you've never seen a road or know what cars are. You are walking along a path in the country and you suddenly come across a road. It looks scary. It sounds loud, dangerous. You don't understand it. If you reach out and try and touch it it will take your hand off. Luckily we are all taught be basics from an early age of stop, look and listen. It's part of our culture to ensure that people understand cars and roads. If you are going through live without a basic understanding of personal psychology and you are attacked by a farmer, spot a big spider that terifies you or find out a friend has died. It can be like standing on the middle of a road and seeing a car heading straight for you. If you have been brought up in an emotionally open environment you are normally equiped from an early age with a very basic understanding of psychology. You don't need to know how to drive. But you do need to know when something is a bad idea. Personally I think not having an understanding of psychology at an early age can be more dangerous than not having an understanding of the dangers of roads. There needs to be an instinctive way of dealing with emotional trauma. Oddly stop, look and listen seem to be a good idea here too. Or stop and assess what's happened and be aware of your feelings, try to put what's happened into perspective and communicate with people about your feelings. It's odd to me that many people hope and assume that thier child won't have any traumatic experience in thier life. Yet at the same time have a deep fear of roads. I guess because one of tangeable, instant and immediate threat. The other one... well... doesn't bare thinking about..

2. Can roads and cars be used? Well, yes, when you're growing up you are often driven around by your parents to all sorts of things. Things you do, like school and things that your parents do and you find boring like the weekly food shop. I think in these early years psychologically this is much the same. You are so close with your parents when they are happy, you are happy, when they are sad you are sad. A child tends to pick up on a hell of a lot from the parents, not just mood but coping mechanisms. The child picks up values of what to do to make you happy and what to do that will make you sad. One example would be a coping mechanism like alcoholism, the child learns that that's how you cope with things regardless of the pain and suffering they know it causes.

3. What happens when you're old enough to drive? Always a nervous time. You reach an age as a teenager when you come across a barrier. You can't be the person you want to be, achieve what you want to acheive unless you can drive. (I know lots of people don't drive, but you get the idea of what I'm saying.. right?) The same is said for psychology. During puberty, discovering sexual urges, relationships and greater emotional independence. It suddenly becomes important to want to drive and also to have a better understanding of your own psychology and the psychology of people around you. You need to learn the rules of the road in relationships to prevent ending up in an emotional wreckage.

Unfortunately there isn't really a lot of support for going through this process, you don't get personal training once a week and a test at the end to ensure you've understood how to lead a mentally positive live. That you've got a good understanding of yourself and others around you to be able to handle any situation. Instead it's more like learning how to drive a car by playing Grand Theft Auto. Teen mags, gossip at school and reality TV are what educate our youths. Scary!

Types of driving.

Lone driving - Lone driving can be very empowering you can have the music you want on and turn it up really loud. You can go whereever you want, whenever you want. The trouble is, if you get lost you can't really read a map and drive at the same time. Occasionally you need to stop everything. Check the map and then try and work your way back on track.

Car pooling - Like a partner, you're both going to the same place so you share the journey. You can both take turns at driving. If you get lost the other person can look at a map whilst you concentrate on the road, or when it gets really bad. Change drivers.

Road trip - You and a few mates are off into the wild blue yonder. Mates can also help with directions and share the driving, but they aren't nesessarily going where you want to do and the trips can become something special rather than every day.

Taxi! - For when you've really lost your way and you don't have you car to drive in and you can't turn to your friends or partners for help. A taxi is very useful. You get to set the direction and the taxi driver will get you home. This is where a therapist can come in handy. They know the roads ahead and they can help get you there.... as long as you're paying!

Bus - For when a taxi is too expensive and whilst the bus isn't going ecactly where you want or in the most direct route, but it'll get you close enough for you to go the rest of the way yourself. Self help books, motivational courses and inspirational talks are the buses of psychology. But you've got to understand the bus timetable to make sure you get the right bus to the right destination and be lucky enough for the bus to turn up when you want it.

Ambulance/Police car - For when you're not in a fit state to drive and no one expects you to pay for a taxi. The worrying trasport methods for when you are in a really bad state of mind. More often than not, a risk to others. We all hope we avoid getting a lift in the ambulance/police cars of this world!

To relate this to where I am right now, I've been lone driving. I've had to stop for directions. But I'm thinking about calling a taxi. Just need to work out what sort of firm I need and how on Earth I'm going to be able to pay for it.

Take care

What will be the next Twitter?

2009-04-03T08:35:00.001+01:00

I love this video. I think this is a worrying glimpse into the future. :-)

What would you buy The Queen?

2009-04-01T20:33:00.004+01:00

Hello

I've just been reading about Obama's visit to The Queen. http://www.cbsnews.com/blogs/2009/04/01/politics/politicalhotsheet/entry4910527.shtml

I'm shocked... absolutely shocked. I love Obama, but really. On what PLANET do you think... hmm... maybe she'd like an ipod? REALLY?? THE QUEEN??? What are they going to get her on their next visit, a hoodie and a skateboard??

So I've been trying to think what Obama COULD have got.

The Queen is getting on and those glasses keep getting bigger and bigger. Why not show your love buy buying a nice 60 inch plasma screen with surround sound with extra big sub woofer, just in case the hearings going too.
A Sony Reader or Kindle. Filled with historical American or English texts and if they want to make it a bit tacky Obama can always throw in his books.
X Box 360. At least it's something the grand kids can use.
Pimp her Resolute desk. Both The Queen and Obama have desks made from HMS Resolute. I'm sure Obama's been thinking how he can make his a bit more geeky. He could do the same with The Queens desk. Built in a screen that sinks into the desk, touch screen table top (Microsoft Surface) and a shield that raises at the front of the desk. Not because anyone would try to attack her, (they wouldn't dare) but in case she sneezes or needs to pick her nose, this would ensure her dignity is preserved.
A new car. Yes, The Queen has just got a new funky car with all the gadgets, but it's not as cool or funky as Obama's "The Beast".
A link from whitehouse.gov to http://www.royal.gov.uk/ The Queen does love her website. Show some love Obama and send her some hits!!
An Oscar! Granted she wasn't in the film 'The Queen' with Helen Mirran, but really. you can't say she isn't a star of the film. I think The Queen would LOVE an Oscar. This would really go over well and firmly cement the 'special relationship'.
Get the street artist that did the famous painting of Obama to do one of The Queen. The Queen loves art and has many official portraits. But this one would be really special and could boost the image of The Queen all over the world.
Bush's head on a silver platter. Nothing says respect like killing the thing that threatens Kingdom. Back in the good old days, this would have been done without question. Some traditions really should be brought back. We can put it on a spike outside the Tower of London and people can throw things at it. This would also spark financial recovery, by providing a MASSIVE influx of tourism all wanting to see the head.
Presidency of the United States. Ok, a little unconventional. But let's face it, the republicans suspected that something like this might happen. :-) Now that America's struggling it's time for a merger, economies of scale show the more you merge the greater efficiencies. If we pull in some more of the commonwealth (Canada, Australia etc) we can truly restore control over the globe. Really.. the more you think about this... the more it makes sense... It's the only way to boost our numbers to a comparable level to China and India.
A lovely broach. Simple, but personal, designed by experts in America and made especially. (Really.. how hard could that be to do?) (mutters: "... bloody ipod...")
Let The Queen feel his pecks. No one would need to know, let's face his her husband isn't exactly buff. It would be a nice memory at least and it wouldn't cost Obama anything. Oh, or they could give her some botox..

I can't believe I've gotten to the end of the post and I'm still upset about this. I hope at the very VERY least they got an ipod that's engraved. Maybe this is because The Queen isn't having a state dinner in his honor and instead the Obama's have to put up with Jamie Oliver's food.

What would you buy The Queen?

Why not twitter?

2009-03-22T23:24:00.007Z

Hello

I think I've misunderstood a key element of twitter when writing my post

Why twitter?

As in the above clip I was only considering what impact or relevance messaging may have on the wider world. I thought it a litle vein of people (lol, says' me with a blog! I'm a TOTAL hypocrite).

Granted you can't deny that some people do use twitter because they think they're a bit special, I'm sure there are also some people who use it because they long for someone to take that level of interest in their lives.

The missing piece of the puzzle.

But I've realised that actually twitter is a very powerful tool to aid good mental health. (As apose to being a clear indicator of bad mental health.)

You're probably wondering how on earth this can be the case. Well...

"the act of observing alters the reality being observed" - Common variation on Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle.

Whilst this principle is primarily designed to describe a principle of Quantum Mechanics. It also applies to psychology.

The number of people that have said to me. "I can't join a gym, if I go by myself I'll never go." or "I've got to bet this done or my boss will be really pissed" or "I never thought I could do that, but my kids counting on me" or "My parents would be soo disapointed if I did X, Y or Z"

There's something about pinning what we do, and how we act on the expectations, interation and needs of others. Just knowing that what you do it's just about you makes it more relevant. It makes you more determined to act appropriately regardless of what you personally want to do.

The internal filter

I was driving yp to see my mum today and I realised that I was thinkblogging. (What's that?) Well, thinkblogging is when you discover you start thinking the same way you blog. Almost subconciously you apply boundries to what you think and structure your thoughts as if you were typing straight into a blog. You avoid certain topics that you wouldn't discuss on a blog, you think things through in a more structured way and you filter the way you think it just incase someone who knows you might read it and learn too much. Your thoughts become a blog post.

Because you're paying more attention as to how you think you naturally think differantly. I realised that I was thinking more positively, more protactively and I was thinking as if I was accountable for those thoughts, rather than them just being meaningless things that crop into my head.

Being accountable to our thoughts by someone else can often be enough to motivate us to change our perception of things.

What's this got to do with twitter?

Well you see, twittering isn't so much holding yourself accoutable to your thoughts as it is holding yourself accountable to your actions. Because your tweets are public (even is no on reads them ( like this blog)) they have power. You wouldn't want to twitter your constant failures for the world to see would you? Something kicks in and you want to tweet the things that make you feel good. Even if you tweet something that seems meaningless like "I got to work and I was 5 mins late." To you this might actually mean your doing well today, because your normally 15 mins late. If you tweet "watching a film with my partner." You are probably actually saying to yourself, "I value my partner, we do fun things together, I'm happy". If you become a twitterdict or twitter adict you probably find you exercise much more control over you actions because they suddenly seem to be more relevant. They carry meaning and they are of value, even if no one's reading them.

Is this a new concept?

No. There are many examples of how we've given relevance to things through our perception of what others might think rather than what we want. Here are a couple..

Keeping up with the neighbourhood. Ok, so the grass is getting a little long, but I'd rather be watching TV.... but what will the neighbours think? I'll do the lawn...

Religion. No one would notice if I did X, Y, or Z, but God (or Santa) would and he's keeping track. I can't be seen to fail in their eyes.

Deceased people. I would really like to do X, Y or Z and I know no one would care.... but my Nan said I shouldn't and I'd hate it if she looked down and saw me.

These examples are arguable and really based on your own personal beliefs. In today's society we are less and less incluned to change our behaviour because of any of these values. These beliefs tend to seem more irrational than in the lives of our ancestors. They seem lesss real and therefore loose their effects.

But it's much easier to have a solid belief and connection if you actually write something dwn and share it on the net. he person who's sitting in judgement, we may not know. But knowing that someone, somewhere may be. This pushes us on to be better than we otherwise would be.

So, why not twitter?

I'm forced to consider whether twitter would help me achieve my goals and be a better person through my actions in the same way I feel this blog is helping me to have more healthier thoughts.

What would the world be like if we all twittered? Who knows. But for the first time I'm starting to think it might actually be a better place for all of us ot live. What do you think?

Who's late night shopping?

2009-03-21T21:53:00.005Z

Hello

I'm having one of those days where all the little things that go wrong appear like a huge mountain in front of me. Not being able to see the top, it seems almost impossible to think I have to climb it.

On days like this I often revert to a need to buy something bad for me that I can't afford. Junk food, dvd's, maybe some beers. Which is how I ended up in the supermarket.

Supermarkets are weird places, there probably the only time to see a complete cross section of society. There one of the places we so commonly find ourselves in, surounded by people but ultimately alone, annonymous. I swear in supermarkets these days you could drop dead and no one would notice. Especially the staff. I'm sure zombie films are made by people who used to work in a supermarket.

But there's something quite reasuring about late not shopping when you're not feeling to good. You can be around others that are in exactly the same mood. First stop in the store is the DVD's. The isle's odly now been moved to the back of the store, so you have to walk past the stationary, home and garden products of all description and all manor of things on your way. The DVD aisle is always quite busy. Late nights especially, always middle aged guys with vacant looks. They don't pick up any of the DVD's, they never seem to buy them either. But they are always there. Occasionally moving along the aisle a bit when they think it starts to look a bit odd that they aren't moving along. Shoulder's slumped forward as if they have just lost all hope.

I managed to get 'Burn after reading' I've been waiting for it to come out on DVD for ages and I'm confident it will put a good dent in my mood and I move on round the store.

I've forgotten what else I wanted, so wander aimlessly, passing aisle after aisle. Past the special Mothers Day section where I suddenly realise most people in the store are foraging for anything Mothers Day related. (Luckily this I sorted mine pressie ages ago.) Half of them carrying a bunch of flowers (which are starting to look like they've had their best days already). The other areas of the store are quite quiet. The odd couple, odd odd couples as well. They too have a vacant look in their eyes when they're looking at the shelves which the quickly hide when they start to talk to their partner "Shall we get 2 of these, or do you think one is enough?" or "Oh, this one's got mushrooms!" There's only so much fake excitement you can put into your voice when you're trying to sell the line "Oh, this one's got mushrooms!". Instead of solving their problem it is like a big sign appears over their head saying "Ahh, you're annoying me. Where did we go wrong?"

I get some milk and beer and head for frozen foods. Today's a day where Ben and Jerry's is certainly called for. Preferably Cookie Dough, half way through contemplating how big a tub I need I turn the corner to find a young girl staring at the Ben and Jerry's, her boyfriend spooning her from behind. He's trying to sound really interested in the conversation she's having about the merits of the differant types of Ben and Jerry's. Nibbling the back of her neck. Damn.... I really need Ben and Jerry's... I'll need to go a circuit of the shop and come back.

Past the crisps aisle and the beer again, this time busy with a group of kids trying to work out which one of them looked the oldest, so they could by beer. Another suggesting that they try and get away with 'self scan'. I carry on, past the cleaning products and it suddenly jumps into my head. I need sink unblocker. Not really the reason I went to the store, but as I'm thier. Why not.

Right, they must have finished in the ice-cream aisle by now, so I head back. They haven't. But they have moved on from the Ben and Jerry's section so I swoop the last big tub of Cookie Dough and make for the check outs.

I just get beaten to a really good check out because one of the zombie's has managed to get thier trolley to block half the aisle and their ass to fill the rest. A brilliant skill which happens so often in the supermarket you'd think they were training people to do it. But, I'm getting distracted, where was I.

I make it to a check out which is facing the self scan. The spooning couple from earlier walking rather quickly past with a 2Litre tub of strawberry icecream, a big tub of Ben and Jerry's, huge bag of chocolate and crisps. They can't possibly be planning on eating all of that, so I'm guessing he couldn't wait any longer to get home and just grabbed anything in sight.

I get served and asked for ID for the beer, which considering I'm 27 and you can drink here at 18 is a bit harsh. Normally this would be quite a complement, but the check out guy make it clear that he thought I was definitly over 25, but the computer randomly selected me for a check. (Yeah.. thanks for that. Like I wasn't feeling down enough before.)

I pick up my bags and catch out of the corner of my eye the kids from the beer aisle just leaving the store with big grins on their faces...I'm guessing they weren't randomly selected for an ID check.

With a flash back to the days when I used to attempt things like that... seeming soo long ago now. I leave the store feeling not only down but old as well.

Oh well. Now I'm going to watch the film and devour my ice-cream. Hopefully that'll put me in a better mood.

Night!

What impact will the internet have on the world?

2009-03-20T21:51:00.009Z

I had some spam.. hmm.. useful industry news letter. Through today. I was bored so I read it and unlike most of the c$%p I get through this, was one got my brain going. What happens next with the Internet?

"With talk even of Web 3.0 on the horizon, once enterprises and individuals have become more comfortable with the current Web 2.0 media, there's a raft of possibilities where digital content and communities are melding in a way unthinkable before broadband, before mobile and before content. Perhaps in years to come, historians will look back at this first decade of the new millennium and amongst other historical events, take note of the immense cultural changes engendered by mass access to content, and will see it as the first post-modern digital revolution which saw the death of distance and the birth of the real knowledge economy." - Paul Quigley - Enterprise Content Management 365

One culture - Internet culture

For decades the popularity of Western and particularly American culture has had an impact on societies around the world. But it's always been as something separate, different 'cool'. With the widespread use of the Internet then that boundary that kept the different cultures apart. We truly are moving beyond boarders. This past year has exposed the real extent of globalisation. The American elections swept the whole world up, with people having a view on the candidates regardless of what country they were from. This is the first election where the real cultural phenomenon that's been taking place within America was actually experienced in all countries. The first election that felt like a global election. Like it was an election of a world president. The political language in America is understood by many outside it's boarders through TV, music and the Internet.

Equally evident is the economic crisis as a global phenomenon. The normal checks and balances aren't in place because all the banks had the same view around the world. It wasn't one group did one thing and the others did something else. Everyone acted together. The big safeguard that there used to be was cultural differance. The attitude towards lax regulation was common all over the place and the massive media switch from hope to fear. Fear of a global depression and anger at the banks is truly global. These events have really acted as a catalyst for people to realise just how closely so many countries and cultures are growing together. All the inter linkages. All the shared hopes, dreams and fears. Main society opened it's eyes and didn't see their world ending at a boarder but was universal.

What does this change? Where does the technology go?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/5370688.stm

It's interesting to see the view points of others, the great fears the experts have. Knowledge is power and the Internet is the greatest source of knowledge yet. So I can see the logic behind their 'end of the world' predictions.

In some senses we are setting a cultural reset button, the structures and concepts of a 'social contract' don't seem to apply to the Internet yet. There aren't be cultural boundaries online that we're built, rely on and often take for granted off-line. But unlike the dooms day predictions I don't think that this won't happen. We have the templates of social structure, democracy, anti competition regulation, law and fair justice. We will be forced to have to apply these on a global level. Better cooperation between police forces, better cooperation on regulation and political movements that spread beyond a single country. The closer we move towards a single culture the risk of war becomes greatly reduced. However the risk of terrorism becomes amplified. There will always be a minority in a culture that opposes authority. But over time we will overcome this as we have overcome civil war and violent protests in our own national cultures.

How long these changes will take? No one knows. Will we take a big step backwards if we are slow to build our social boundaries into a global online culture? What's really up to us. Will it be an easy transition? No, and it won't be a straight line from here to global peace and a true global culture.

We've been lucky in the past, we've had the right leaders at the right times following civil wars that have driven us to a more socially just society. I hope we can make this relatively bloodlessly. We already have good templates we can use.

I think that the Internet is much more likely to change how we do things, rather than what we do. After all, we are still human. The Internet won't change that.

What do you think?

What if you started a religion now?

2009-03-20T00:15:00.002Z

Hello

I've bizarely been thinking about what if religion started nowadays what it would look like.

1. It would start online with an interactive website and a youtube channel.

2. You'd have to subscribe to their newsletter and instead of getting their holy book all at once it would be slowly fed out.

3. You only get to confess things and ask advice on a 30 day trial period, after that you have to start paying.

4. You get to build your own profile on their website and rate how religious you think the other members are. The person getting the lowest score is kicked out.

5. A few months after the site's been running a group of members decide that the religion has things wrong with it and start a rival website based on the same principles.

6. The bulletin board is filled with messages condeming other websites for not abiding by the tips from this weeks newsletter.

7. Once the site's been running for a year one of the members launches a campaign to remove the founders and take over. This is very sucessful and the members start a relentles campaign against the members that origionally broke away from the site.

8. The mangers of the site decide to build the largest and most advanced servers they can, to honor the religion and expand it's appeal to new joiners. They start a 'donate now' campaign and remind the members to contribute constantly.

9. The campaign hasn't brought enough money in, so the site starts merchandising the brand.

10. The campaign still doesn't get enough money in so they start organising FlashMobs to protest against individuals and companies that don't agree with thier principles. Clearly they are out to get them.

Anyone got any other comparisons?

What is the value of Christianity?

2009-03-18T22:25:00.007Z

Hello

Well, the blogs for some big questions so this is a big question. I'm not religious, I consider myself agnostic (I have a personal level of faith and beliefs but they don't fit any known religion). So in this century called the post religion century, what is the value of Christianity.

Historical Merits of Christianity.

The Bible - Fact or Fiction?

I'm just watching a documentary on the TV about the truth behind religion. I'm shocked to learn that Jesus wasn't born in Bethlehem. According to the documentary Jesus was of Nazareth. In Jewish faith a great leader would come from Bethlehem. So the writers of the bible used creative licence to add in the idea that Mary would trek across the country to Bethlehem for a census to the Roman Empire. The problem is the Roman Empire didn't stretch that far.

So, regardless of your personal beliefs, let's just explore the possibility that the Bible is less a historical fact, but more of a wikapedia. A document that is revised and altered to better suit the reader (and the writer). There are many and many examples of this happening it would take months to go through them all. Some of the most recent changes are documented here http://www.av1611.org/biblecom.html But the Bible has been altered right from the start.

So, why was the Bible written? Jesus didn't write it. He didn't ask for it to be written, otherwise it wouldn't have taken 150 years to get around to it. I mean who procrastinates THAT much especially when the son of God asks you to do things.

So, what was the basis of the Bible? Why was it created? Who was it for?

Oddly, I've just realised, I've never wondered WHY the Bible was created. I just accepted that of course it would be. Just like, if you go on Big Brother, of course you're going to release a Christmas song, exercise video and a biography, all within a few months. But why create it is key to understanding the document. It gives it context. Let's not forget, Jesus wasn't part of a reality TV show. No one knew who he was, so why would anyone want to read a book about him? Who bought it? Well, books back then had to be handwritten, they were very expensive and only the very rich could afford it.

This website (although bias,) has some interesting perspectives on the issue.

http://www.thirdmill.org/answers/answer.asp/file/99932.qna/category/th/page/questions/site/iiim

It's important to remember that context is very important. The Bible was written in a time before the Internet (yes, such a time existed). Before the telephone, radio, television, train, newspaper and even the printed book. Villages did barter and currency was around, but very very little literature existed. Most village communities were probably getting pretty bored before then. There's only so many stories that can be told in a community. A book was a great opening into something wider, it was the source of knowledge and entertainment. A book like the Bible had to BE the whole of the Internet in one for people to invest soo much money in it. It had to teach people, it had to have history, drama, morals, fantasy, intrigue, news, politics, public opinion and much much more. I'm finding it difficult to find something in modern society I can relate it too, everything nowadays is so.. instant. Closest I can get is when the Wii first came out. If you had it then you had status (or you'd slept outside the shop). Friends, family and in some cases neighbours would come round to wonder at it. Or when the new Harry Potter books come out and there's a competition as to who's got to what page so far.

There's much debate around the changes that happened to Christianity, the move away from Judaism which was boosted by the Roman attack on Jerusalem and shaped, largely by St. Paul. The message changed to suit the politics and power of the day as it has done ever since.

Why is it SO popular?

We'd like to think that psychology and sociology have only been invented recently. Granted the terms and the depth of understanding has advanced significantly. But that's not to say that people haven't had an understanding of what motivates people, how people act both individually and as a group. Psychological issues didn't start because Freud invented them, he observed people. Propaganda wasn't invented by the Victorians, that's been going on since the dawn of man and understanding what makes a viable society is what has allowed our species to grow and thrive.

There are a great deal of universal truths that shine out from the Bible. Have you ever read a book, seen a comedian, heard a great speech and thought, "Wow, I do that too." or "I agree they make a lot of sense, but I thought I was the only one that thought that way." The Bible helped people feel connected, allowed them to explore view points that they hadn't before. The Bible (like most religious text) provided the information people needed to succeed. Through greater education, moral guidance societies with a strong religious grounding have grown and thrived.

The text at the time represented the latest thinking, ethics and ethos of the advanced Roman Empire.

Christianity - Aiding human evolution

Religions have been a glue that has brought people together. The Church introduced schools, hospitals, counselling and therapy and held out above all else the concept of sacrifice for society, for the greater good. The Church was for a long time quite left wing in it's thinking. Society held up Christianity as the right way to behave. It has been important for the good of society to entrench certain values more than others. That life is precious, so try not to kill too many people. That you shouldn't go around shagging everything in sight because society can't care for all the children, and once you've picked one person to shag, stay with them and raise the children. It helped pull ourselves away from our natural instinct, urges and caveman like attitudes to something more. To an appreciation of the greater society.

Sacrifices had to be made

In order for Christianity sustain itself for so long, it needed the backing of the state, Kings, Lords, Barons all had to 'get it' and like it. They were the ones with the power and influence to keep the religion going. The context of the Bible's teachings adapted and manipulated by whoever was in charge at the time. Subjugation of women and fear towards other religions acted to support those in charge and defend the faith. I'm sure these were seen at the time as necessary for the greater good.

Conclusion

So I think that the Bible and the religion based on it is really driven by this social and cultural need for guidance, structure and co-operation. Society needs role models in order to work out what they should do. A template of how you should act. If you base behaviour purely on the people you know, society would be extremely fractured. In a time where few people ever travelled to the next town. How do you create a coherent country. How do you create loyalty and get people to abide by the law? You need something that unites everyone. Something that everyone believes in.

Religion has been essential in order to get us where we are today. It's been our training wheels as our society has evolved. We owe a lot to religion. But that doesn't mean that we can't evolve beyond it. We have reached a point in society that we are able to revise and refine our faith. Whilst the key values in Christianity are universal, they are in all religions and they will live beyond Christianity as they do for many people, including myself, in today's society.

We are at a point now where the essence, the core right and wrong. that has inspired so many to be good people, has lived on. The sacrifices that were made to accommodate the times they were written are no longer needed. I appreciate that not many people agree on what aspects of the teachings fall under the necessary and the not necessary parts of the Bible, that debate will go on for a long time. But I think we are moving towards making better decisions about what we need and what we don't. We are able to build a better template for a society that doesn't have the constraints that most religions had in the past. We're still seeking enlightenment and social acceptance, they are key to our human psychology.

So, the value of Christianity? It has been huge. It should be respected as a very good idea. But it can't be seen as perfect. It can't prevent new and better ideas. It may be the foundation to our society, but now we want to build the walls, the roof. We want to use what we know now to create the social template that, I beleive, those who started religion truly wanted to, but couldn't achieve in their day.

Are you religious or not? What do you think? I'm more than happy to receive other view points on this, for or against.

What are the little horns in a giraffe are called and what is/was their function?

2009-03-16T19:27:00.009Z

Congratulations Lauren!

Thank you for your question! I've put my thinking cap on and also done some reasearch. But first my theory.

My Theory - Medieval Jousting.

There are many discussions online about the evolution of the giraffe. God, Intelligent design or Evolution. I'm pleased to say I've solved it! Back in medievil times people were bored. REALLY bored. They couldn't create blogs, watch tv or text their friends. So when they weren't at war with their neighbours they practiced their jousting skills. But some of the knights couldn't find anyone to play with, that's when they decided to genetically modiftied a deer so that they could play joust. The experiments we're perfect as the technology hadn't been perfected, which resulted in the change of fur colour, but low and behold a perfect jousting partner was born. The first giraffe was called Jeff and was a great sucess. Soon everyone wanted one. The giraffe had many advantages to a real jouster. The ability to extend it's neck and see exactly where to hit it's opponent came in very useful. Over time the best giraffes had the longest necks so that could knock the knight of thier horse before they were struck by the big stick.

So, why are they all in africa? Well.. Jeff's great great great grandson, Dave, was the giraffe to the King of France. Unfortuantely Dave was very good and the King kept loosing, He lost so often people started making fun of how small and ineffective his stick was. One day the King was so annoyed be banished all the giraffe to a far far away place. Now known as Africa. Without a jousting partner, the King started wars with people.

The real answer

The name

The horn like pertrusions from a giraffes head are called ossicones. It is so named because they are made up of ossified cartilage. (What the ducks that?) Well.. Ossified cartilage is hardened or calcification soft tissue to form a bonelike material. Words begining with os-, oss-, ost-, oste- os are all latin for bone. So, geniuses that they were they're actually BoneCones. (Not sure whether this is where the term 'boner' came from, but I'd like to think it might be)

Ossicones are differant to horns purely because they remain covered in skin where as horns aren't.

Where'd they come from?

The family

Giraffes have evolved from the same family as cattle and deer. Yes, goats, cows, deer, antelopes and giraffes are all related. (Thank god they stopped having family reunions a long time ago). There are many less well known branches of the family called Sivatherium and climacoceratids

largely less well known because they are long extinct. The giraffes closest living relatives are called Okapi (and just like the other Osbourne kids, they're really regretting not going on a reality TV show for fame and fortune and now languish in obscurity) The many genetic off spring largely changed shape and form through many variation because of the environments they were in. Variations of these species have been found in Europe, Africa, Middle East and Asia. All evolving differantly.

The horns

It is believed, (although no pay-per-view cable footage of this remains) that the ossicones were used for fighting. The ossicones were much bigger back in the day and like Deer they would have reasonably friendly fights with each other to establish who was in charge. (The two bucks circle each other, bend back their legs, lower their heads, and charge.) The male in charge after these fights got the pick of the mates. Giraffes still compete within their groups, but instead of using their ossicones they wrap their long necks around each other.

Evolution at work

The male with the best mates produced more off spring. So you'd think that evolution would provide them with bigger better stronger ossicones/horns? Well.. no. You see sources of food were rare. Those with a longer neck were able to aquire more food and become stronger. So although they might have had smaller ossicones/horns, they were stronger. This ment that they won the fights and produced more off spring. Suddenly long necks were in and big ossicones/horns were out! They became the human dating equivelent of a tiny penis and no girl was interested. (Ossicones/horns - don't know when they started growing skin over them. They started as horns and then became ossicones.. at some point.)

Why have them now?

Well.. I've searched the net and there are a few theories. But the most likey answer is they just got left over. Eventually they were small enough not to be 'ugly' and having them stopped being a mating factor so the genetics were never fully cleaned of them. Just like the appendix in humans. No one would stop going out with you because of the size of your appendics, so it's stayed, dispite being pointless.

Personally though I think they've become the giraffe equivelent to a hard hat. If you've ever gone apple picking you'll know that it's useful to have something to stop branches wacking you in the head. Unfortunately there isn't any scientific evidence to support this but I'm yet to hear of a giraffes going "Ahh. my head! Bloody trees! Why can't we get some grass and eat like a cow? That's it I'm moving back to France!"

Want to know more?

http://www.wordinfo.info/words/index/info/view_unit/1519 - Other latin boner words

http://www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Giraffe - General giraffe info

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_are_the_horns_of_a_giraffe

http://www.absoluteastronomy.com/topics/Okapi - The Okapi

I also learnt that ossification means a rigid, unimaginative convention. So feel free to impress people with things like "this convention on the colour of milk is suffering from ossification"

Lauren. I hope this answers your question. That's killed some time and hopefully sorted your homework ;-) Thanks for leaving a comment and I hope you'll be back to visit the blog again.

Anyone got anymore questions?

What is the answer? - Special Offer

2009-03-15T16:54:00.003Z

Hello

Well.. a week and a half into the blog and I'm pleased to say I have 2 visitors... yes.. 2. Out of the estimated 1 billion online users. I'm just hoping that that 2 wasn't actually just one person visiting twice. Although it would be good to have a repeat visitor!

So I've decided I need to give some incentives... as well as do some marketing.

SPECIAL OFFER!!!!

Yes, be the first to comment on ANY of the posts and you get to ask a question. Any question you like. I'll go away, think about it, research it and post what I've thought up. Try not to waste the offer on something rubbish like "Why don't you go and shove your head up your ass?" Clearly given the muscular flexibility of the male body it's impossible. However it is interesting to note that you can actually stick someone else's head up your ass. Ass muscles are extremely flexible. .... i've heard! ;-)

Don't worry if you aren't the first person, come up with an interesting enough quesiton and I'll probaby research that too out of pure curiosity and boredom!

How many types of friend do you have?

2009-03-15T12:40:00.008Z

Hello

I think social networking was invented by someone like me. Who likes the idea of having lots of friends, but tihnks it could be more 'efficient'. Sorry, that does make me sound cold. But I'm really not. I'm someone who strongly believes in best friends. I have a small network of very close friends. But then a have a big network of not so close friends.

Maintaining 'not so close' friendships is difficult and time consuming. Very inefficient. After all there's a reason you like and want to be friends with them, but there's also a reason they aren't 'best friends'. This can be for any number of reasons, let me know if any of these ring a bell with your friend network?

Work friends - It's good to have someone you can confide in about work things, someone who you know has your back. But work life doesn't nesessarily translate well into your private life. There are typically thing you don't want getting out at work! (Especailly if your friend is your boss!)

Long Distance Friends - Oh, gone are the days you could phone them up at 5 and be in be pub at 6 for a night on the town. These are friends that through pure circumstances no longer live near you and you start to fall behind on their every day activities. You can't be there when they're low and they can't be there for you when you are. Although neither party typically wants it to happen, the friendship inevitibly drifts.

Friends that fell in love - In my experience this is the most painful type of friendship. Someone who you're really close to, get on well with and increasingly seems to spend time with suddenly announces they are in love with you. Telling a friend that you don't feel that way is very hard. It's also hard to know that if such a thing were to happen to that firend you'd normally be the person they talk to, but now your the problem not the solution. The awkwardness of this situaiton makes it almost inevitable that the friendship won't last.

Friends that just aren't that into you - You think they live such facinating lives, they always know what to do. You look up to them as a role model of how you should be. But they keep cancelling on you and you found out they went out with loads of people and didn't invite you. Yes, you're friend just isn't that into you. As happens in relationships, this can happen in friendships too. It's a shame, but it's inevitable. These are typically the friends you aren't too close to but for years to come you'll wonder 'what did I do wrong?' 'did I drive them away?' 'maybe I should have texted/called them more?"

Desperate Friends

This is my second most annoying type of friend. The type of person that's happy to buy you things, drinks, tickets etc. They phone you on a regular basis and are always making plans for you to go out. (I know I havent gotten to the annoying bit yet.. bare with me). - I've had to split this up into subcatagories

It's all about THEM friends - These are the types of people who, when you do spend time with them spend ALL of it talking about themselves. Typical conversations that are repeated over and over and over until you want to tear out your eyes and ears. If you've ever thought "FFS Just break up with them, they're bad news! They were bad news when you first got together 2 years ago, they're still bad news now. AHHHH!!! Why ask for advice if you aren't going to listen to it!!!" I have the utmost sympathy for anyone with a friend like this. In other respects they may be great, but when you start having dark thoughts about hurting them if they bring it up again, it's probably a good idea that you don't spend too much time with them.

"I just want to spend time with you" friend - The type of firend that doesn't really have anything to SAY about themselves and starts pointless conversations all the time. If they've asked you the same question 3 times in a single conversation and won't get off the phone even when the conversation died 20 minutes ago. These are desperate friends. I feel sorry for this type of friend because they clearly need something, but won't really talk about it. Push too hard to try and find out the reason and you get the "I just want to spend time with you, what's wrong with that?" This type of friend typically doesn't want to go out much or do anything exciting together, they just want to 'hang out' all the time and talk about... nothing. It's very difficult to breathe live into these friendships so again you start to distance yourself. (Yes, drifting from this type is very hard, it's more a crowbar you need to get them off! Unfortunately you usually loose them as a friend in the process)

Friends from the past - You were once, bet buds and they always knew what you were thinking. But both you and your friend have grown up a bit. Interests have changed, you've both moved on with your lives. But when you do get together you can't think of any reason why you don't spend more time with each other. But then you don't see each other for 6 months or so, cos of work or family, or relationships. These are the 'lost friends'. I miss these friends the most. It seems that fate has pulled you in two very differant directions and the gap seems to keep getting bigger every time you see them.

Ex boy/girl friends - "Promise me, we'll always be friends" or "Can't we just be friends" are two of the biggest 'miss sell' of any friendships. You like to think you won't loose that person just because you aren't dating. After all they still mean a lot to you. But it's never the same after the break up. All the fun memories, the occasional surpressed sexual tension, the hole you feel in the pit of your stomach when they start dating someone else. Even with the best of intentions friendships with ex's rarely work out. And they NEVER work out if you try and be friends straight after the break up. You need a good couple of years apart if this type of friendship is going to stand any chance at all.

The 'Not really friends' friends - We've all got loads of these. People who hang out in the same group as your friends. Someone who you always say hi to and small talk them. But really you know very little about them and for some reason you just haven't 'clicked' but they're friends with your friends, so they become friends by default. This is an odd friend group, you go to their birthday because all you other friends are going, but you just have no idea what to get them as a pressie because you don't really know them. This is a difficult dilema as if getting vouchers might as well be the same thing as wearing a t-shirt saying "Don't know who the f&^k you are, but I heard there's free beer?"

Aww.. this post has really brought back a lot of memories, good and bad. That's all the types I can think if at the moment. Will update if I can think of more. Add a comment if you can think of any more?

Starship Troopers - A shocking prediction of the future?

2009-03-11T22:59:00.006Z

Hello

I watched Starship Troopers earlier and I was quite surprised how many similarities the film had with events that have taken place since the film was made. Is the story so sucessful because it deals with what would happen when a society is threatened. Is it because the film was based on the book of a writer who's inspiration was the experiences he had during the second world war and history is doomed to repeat itself? Life imitates art as it where, but in this sci-fi film which is seemingly so abstract from reality were they able to show something true about the human condition.

Similarities

Patriotism

Film: Youth being taught a strong patriotic bond. That there should be almost blind alligence with their society.

Reality: Patriotism has always played a major role in American society. It was really nesessary for a country that was such a melting pot of so many immigrants that people held alligence to America, rather than their countries of origin. Whilst times may have changed, this hasn't. As shown during the many debates about whether the presidential candidates were seen to be 'patriotic enough to be president' http://www.columbiamissourian.com/stories/2008/07/15/patriotism-shouldnt-be-questioned-just-taught/

Military Glorification

Film: "I'm doing my part. Service guarentees citizenship. Would you like to know more?"

The film clearly shows the wonder with which the new recruits look upto the all powerful military and quite literally put their lives in it's hands.

Reality: The US military has a very active publicity machine designed to boost faith (and 'faith') in the military. In a democracy this is an important thing for a military to do as they need to 'justify' their budgets and support for the military often gives political cover. (Just been reading exerts of this (http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=zB8J2ho-0k8C&pg=PA32&lpg=PA32&dq=Guts+and+Glory:+The+Making+of+the+American+Military+Image+in+Film+synopsis&source=bl&ots=7YXQg6KNmV&sig=TOVBIM2x5PhZQlrmpo0kDg67QMc&hl=en&ei=5lK4Sf2XDtnHjAeMqJmcCQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=1&ct=result#PPR11-IA1,M1)

"To the extent that the book has a thesis, it postulates that hollywood's creation image of the all-powerful, always victorious armed services through the late 1950's contributed to the ease with which Lyndon Johnson and the best and brightest people in government tok the United States int othe quagmire of Vietnam."

The book not only explains the motivation of some to glorify the military in America but also the effects this glorification can have, positive and negative. How it can pursuade people of the military's invincibility, strength and urgent purpose of it.

BUT.... Yes. But of course these are common aspects of American society. Get to the future bit!

ok!

A Society Attacked

Film: The film shows that an enemy known, but thought to not be a huge threat (Arachnids) are able to launch a massive and devistating attack on Buenas Aries. The routine of peoples lives and training camp exercies suspended as everyone is glued to the news to see this attack. Revenge, anger and loss are all clearly viewable and commented on in the news article. So, what is such a society to do? War.

Reality: You probably know where I'm going with this. You probably remember where you were the day it happened. September 11th. Burn't into all our minds as a great turning point. When we all suddenly felt so vulnerable, angry and vengeful after the terrorist attacks. Just starring at the 24 hour news channels watching the flames and smoke billowing out of the World Trade Centre. It didn't take long for the news to speculate the guilt and start discussing what a suitable response would be. It wasn't long before we all started learning about Afghanistan. I'd barely heard of it before and I certainly couldn't place it on a map. But something 'had' to be done. There would be a 'war on terror'. But it wasn't clear where on the map this war would be.

Knee Jerk Invasion

Film: Very quickly it seems an invasion is planned and launched against Klendathu (sp?). The decisions are based on the societies pre-existing assumptions of the enemy. Assuming that the insects possessed no actual intelligence and that stopping them would be like stepping on a cockroach.

Reality: Whilst everyone got all 'gun-ho' on revenge, a quickly formed alliance started the invasion of Afghanistan. It's fair to say that there wasn't really time to prepare, ensure that training was given on how to handle combat in rocky environments. Equipment shortages were common and a dreadful lack of interpreters lead to breakdowns in communication with locals. But of course the thinking at the time was that we would capture and hold Afghanistan very quickly.

The West would like to see a short, sharp war resulting in the vaporising of the Taliban followed by a quick transition to a regime the West could live with, while grateful Afghan civilians applaud joyously from the sidelines.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/invasion-by-infidels-will-turn-taliban-into-heroes-670125.html

Just need to quote the chilling last sentence

However truly terrible the consequences, many will happily rally behind the flag.

It's not like no one suspected. But no one listened.

"To fight the bug we must understand the bug"

Film: In the film after the failure of the invasion and the clear misjudgement over the enemy, the leader in charge resigns.

Reality: If only this bit followed the film. If only. Unfortunately it would be another 6 years before the leader that started the invasion would leave.

Also both in the film and in reality numbers of dead seem so abstract. We can't process in our minds the sheer numbers of people who died or were injured. When it started we'd get pages showing the photo's of those killed.. then they stopped doing that. In the film you have the screen with all the names running up, the total at the top over 326,000.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/mar/11/afghanistan.unitednations

Brains of the operation in a cave.

Film: In the film they identify the leader 'brain' bug who's been co-ordinating the mindless arachnids to devastating effects. The specialist skill of the brain bug is less brain washing, more brain sucking. The brain bug is hiding in a complex network of caves and is captured!

Reality: Of course there was clearly a brain behind the organisation, a face and a name, now known by pretty much every man woman and child on the planet. Osama bin Ladin. He two was hiding in caves, opting to brain wash rather than suck. Building and co-ordinating his terror network. Unfortunately again reality didn't quite measure up to the film and we didn't capture the brain bug. In fact he's still alive and free... somewhere.

SO... Did they predict the future?

No, I'm afraid not. It comes down to this. "Those who don't learn from history are destined to repeat it." The film is closely based on key world war two events and references with some creative license thrown in for good measure. The big unprovoked attack being Perl Harbour. The invasion, a variation of D-Day, or the landing in Italy, or probably the failure of Operation Market Garden.

The film is based on sound sociological and psychological reactions, because he saw it happen. Unfortunately we didn't entirely learn from our mistakes. The same or similar mistakes made in the Second World War, Vietnam, Korea, Falkland islands and many more.

So the REAL question is. When will it happen again? How long will it take us to forget these things again? After all the true power of terrorism is it's ability to control what we do, move us away from rational thought where we learn and improve and put us in state where knee jerk reactions seem the only rational option.

What do you think? Be the first to comment on this blog!

"Haven't WE got kids?"

2009-03-10T14:31:00.002Z

More of a follow on to my last post. I spotted this and thought I would share.

What is a Father?

2009-03-10T12:51:00.005Z

Hello

Well, there's the obvious answer. A man who generates sperm which inseminate an egg. That's pretty undisputed.

What is disputed is what should happen next. Is that it? Or should a father mean something more?

If your father is little more than a sperm donor. What do you owe them? What do they owe you?

Now I like difficult quesitons, but I've been struggling with these for a number of years and here's where I stand.

Men have a responsibility for their sperm. If they decide to have unprotected sex then they are accountable for the consequences. Granted mistakes happen, but then there are a number of measures to prevent these mistakes becoming a life long commitment. So if a couple decide not to correct their mistakes they are making a concious decision to commit to the child. Aren't they?

Now, I'm quite surprised what a sensitive issue this is as public debates on this issue nearly always seem to devolve into a discussion of "why can't we have single mum's?"and "If the father is a bad person, then the moter has the right to end the relationship". I agree. I don't see there being a problem with either of these. But my question relates more to the father. Why doesn't the father see it as their responsiblity to not be a bad person? Even if the mother and father aren't together why do some fathers think that gets them 'off the hook' as it where and they don't have to care for their kids?

I love this article. I think it really sums up the crisis of fatherhood society is generating and points out that what we think of as a 'traditional family' isn't so traditional after all!

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1630551,00.html

I find this article facinating as it draws the links between the psychology of the parents and the impacts if has on the children " father-child interactions appear to be central to the development of a child's ability to maintain strong, fulfilling social relationships later in life."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-19960501-000041.html

This answer to distant fathers is also quite interesting.

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_do_children_of_emotionally_distant_fathers_cope_with_their_emotions_and_move_on_to_lead_productive_happy_lives

I'ms getting a little off track... what is a father. Well.. whislt these studies do point out that it's easier for fathers to disconnect emotionally and remove themselves from parenting. I can't help but feel that a REAL father wouldn't. Regardless of the situation. I like the comment "The bottom line is, it's not up to the children to deal with this (parental problems), but either the two parents should grow up and try themselves to deal with their problems."

There really is a debt of responsibility on the father. A debt that society as a whole tends to let slip. There doesn't seem to be the support structures or role models or even social pressure to be a good father these days. But this isn't a social issue really. I think it's more down to the concions of father. It shouldn't be down to society to 'ok' detatchment from the child. The father should see it as their duty to protect and nurture. Whether that's in a relationship with the mother or not. That's not really the important bit. The important bit is being their for the child.

What do you think a father is? Or should be? Would you be like your father?

Is this the start of a New Fascism?

2009-03-09T10:42:00.000Z

Hey

It's become quite a social fact that after a war society tends to move towards the political left. We beleive we're fighting for something good and just and we want that to be reflected in the way we live our lives.

Equally during times of economic hardship we tend to move to the political right. We feel insecure and defensive. We tend to revert to tribalism, (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tribalism) strengthening our bonds and social identity with specific groups of individuals we can relate to. This can take many differant paths but in recent history the most notable is the national darwinistic approach (or fascism).

Technically speaking this is Neo-Tribalism "as the culture and institutions of modernism declined, societies would look to the organizational principles of the distant past for guidance"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neo-Tribalism

And of course you also get an increase in religious tribalism

http://www.sociologyguide.com/types-of-society/Characteristics-of-Tribal-Society.php

It's happened before

1920's Cabaret

Yes, you're probably wondering what on earth this has to do with anything. Well, you're probably familiar with the first and second world wars and you've probably seen loads of films about them. But have you ever really looked into what happened inbetween them in Germany? How did they really go from a defeated and financially ruined country to the biggest threat in Europe in a relatively short period of time? It certainly wasn't a straight line and like much of the world the 1920's was a golden era of liberalism and technological advancement. The cabaret became the blogosphere of it's time with a politics, satire and social debate at the heart of many events (and of course sex at the others, just like the blogosphere :-) ).

http://instruct1.cit.cornell.edu/courses/his452/Alcohol/germancabaret.html

Social acceptance of homosexuality

I think this message really captulates just how quickly a society can move to the right and truely catch people out with devistating consequences.

http://www.qrd.org/qrd/culture/1995/gay.culture.flourished.prenazi.germany-10.95

Key factors

More than ever in my life time society as a whole seems to be reaching out for something. We seem confused about where we go from here. What will global warming mean? what does globalisation mean? What's happening with the economy? Who am I? Where do I fit into society. So more people than ever feel lonely. There are few families with a stable social status and people are much more likely to move to new areas for work. So social bonds aren't that strong right now. Combined with economic hardship and a lack of credible role models it's possible for a strong leader to come to power that will provide a structure and hope that we so desperately need.

Are there signs already?

You may have heard on the new 'British jobs for British workers' not to mention calls for a more'values' driven society over the 13 year old father controversy.

It couldn't happen now

Yes, standard response, but I can't help thinking if you'd of asked all the financial experts in the world just 3-5 years ago whether we could see another depression I bet they would have said something along the lines of "No, it's not possible, lessons were learn't from the great depression, society and financial models have moved on." Ask them now and they'll tell you there were lots of warning signs that were ignored. The news makes it sound like we were 'obviously' heading for trouble, why did no one realise?

So my question to you is really, what happens after a financial collapse? What is stopping a repeat of history?

Is Obama the one to unite a strong left and provide the security and answers we need without is reverting to the hard line traditional instincts on the right?

(Plan to post again with what I think the 'New Fascism' might look like. But feel free to comment on your views. Am I mad?)

The genius of StumbleUpon

2009-03-09T10:23:00.000Z

I don't have a TV. People think I'm mad. How can anyone possibly cope without TV they tell me... You'd miss out on so much. Not really most TV is available online so I can watch what I want and when I want to. I can skip the adverts and the ever longer intros and "previously on...."

You see, I used to have a problem.. a big problem. I would turn on the TV all the time and if there wasn't anything I liked on I would just channel surf flicking from one thing to the next. Or I'd be half way through a program and the adverts come on so I start channel surfing again.

Channel surfing is great. With 40 odd channels you never know what you'll find on the other side and whilst you're watching boring channels on this one you could be missing a good show on the other one.

Whilst I don't have this problem with TV anymore I do with websites. One of the BIG draw backs on the Internet so far has been you need to have a reasonable idea of what you want to see and you search for it. The number of times I've typed 'I'm bored' into Google only to come back with absolute rubbish is quite sad...... UNTIL StumbleUpon came along.

StumbleUpon is like having a 'next channel' button, but for websites. Get bored reading a blog... what else is online 'click'. Oh... musical Horses. 5 mins later. Bored 'click' a dissection of the human brain... 'click' how to take over your country in 5 years... interesting..

Therefore I really recommend you get StumbleUpon http://www.stumbleupon.com/ The only BIG flaw I've found is it doesn't work in Chrome (yet). So I have to use my (now seemingly obsolete IE.)

Try Stumble. Trust me!

Until next time

why twitter?

2009-03-07T11:12:00.000Z

Hello

I thought I should try and cover some of the big stuff first. Not really, I've just been thinking about twitter. The online phenomenon where people update the world with every little thing they do in their lives, from having a cup of tea, to taking out the rubbish (trash). (As if you didn't already know)

All about the now

Aren't we missing something in twitter? Is twitter too much about the RIGHT NOW, it looses all meaning? Would you go back and read past twitters? "Wow, Jane drank tea in 2009! I like tea too but I didn't know her love went back so far. I feel so connected with her."

English teachers (Fame)

One possible reason is the impact of English teachers. Yes... English teachers. I'm sure if you think about it you can remember lessons where you read extracts from the diary of someone long dead and that person is now kindda famous. Be it Anne Frank or Samuel Pepys (fire of London). Your teacher probably went on at length about the importance of these documents as an insight into another world and of course they are. They are also relatively unique insights and whilst I'm sure most of them weren't made with this in mind. The message from English Teachers is "If you write it it may make you famous and also relevant. You'd be creating something that outlives you for centuries to come." Powerful stuff! Of course a lot more powerful if we lived in a time when little records of our lives were kept long term. Why create one now? Everything we see, do and say seems to be recorded and logged somewhere. There's more known now than ever before and more documented than ever before. Rather than twitter giving us relevancy our lives are likely to be lost in a sea of voices.

Art form

It's good, but is it art? Definition: "the quality, production, expression, or realm, according to aesthetic principles, of what is beautiful, appealing, or of more than ordinary significance." Ok. so some twitters are probably more than ordinary. But then I would imagine most of them aren't. But then if I paint something I can guarantee it won't be more than ordinary (as I can't paint). I might still call it art, but I don't think an art expert would. I do wonder if Shakespeare was alive today and he twittered, would student still be dissecting their meaning and relevance hundreds of years from now? Probably not. It's quite difficult to convey the emotional and cultural resonance you get from a play in 140 characters.

Historical Caveman

Yes... I think they were the ones that truly invented twittering (old style). Of course they painted their daily activities on walls. Accordingly to the best rated Yahoo answer it was "to pass time. the same reason little kids draw in the dirt with a stick" Did we start twittering for the same reason? Boredom? Maybe that explains why there's little value in some of the messages... But then twittering is more than just filling time, isn't it?

Social Need?

We wake up and get out of bed and every day for us is working towards something. Twitter doesn't address the basics of 'food, water and shelter'. I doubt you'd really use it to attract dates (hmmm... or would you?) It wouldn't be my first approach to dating, put it that way. There is another need and that is psychological need. The genius of our evolution in a species that isn't the strongest, fastest, biggest animal in the kingdom is being able to work together. Fail to work together and your dead. So it makes sense that we're evolved a social NEED. But isn't social need a two way thing? Does twitter really address that?

Self obsessed?

As an analyzer, I'm very familiar with the idea of self obsession. Although I try my best to to inflict it on others and remain kind and generous. This is already probably the longest blog posting in the world, so I won't do into why we're self obsessed. That's a blog in itself. So for the moment let's just accept that we all are. So twitter's like having a newspaper that's dedicated just to YOU. You're a celebrity in your own world. Generated by you, for the praise and self assurance of you. You feel good because you achieved that cup of tea. It was hard work dragging yourself away from the computer/tv to make it and now you reap the rewards. Why not congratulate yourself and post it for the world to see.

Conclusion

Like most things we do, it's all about the feel good factor. That's not going away and twitter is the latest in a long list of inventions to help us feel better. It gives us reassurance and (at least we think) meaning. I started this post thinking it was pointless 'noise' and that I'd never use it. But, actually. It makes a lot of sense. I think twittering will become BIG.

But it's still not everything. It won't replace all the other things we do. If you want to research a subject you don't go to a historian's twitter to gain insight on the 18th century. You'll only learn about the garden shed their building. Luckily there's still a role for subject based communication and not just updates.

What do you think? Add your comments below!

Welcome to my first message

2009-03-05T22:53:00.000Z

Hello

I know what you're thinking, a blogger. Like the world need another one of those. Why don't you go be a doctor?

Please let me explain why I'm here and maybe that will help.

I'm not here to end up as part of the 'powerful blogger groups' you hear on the news and I'm not doing this to support my YouTube clips of me sticking a tube of toothpaste up my nose and squeezing. No. I suffer from a problem... my brain doesn't stop.

It wanders, it ponders it tries to solve problems. For that is what I think I might be. A problem solver. Analysing the options to form an opinion, reanalysing, rereanalysing.

I normally do this all in my head.... all the time... everyday. Like any addiction that can't be conqured and there are no special groups (bloggers annonymous), I've decided to endulge myself and spew all the thoughts into a blog.

I think the blog will cover a wide range of subjects, currently floating around in my head are some of the following politics and can obama save us, employee engagement in credit crunch and recruitment, the role of masculinity, tribalism in our time, what have we learnt form the past that will help us now, why can't they design a toilet that prevents 'splash back', will the world really end, the crazy world of love and anything else that crops up.

I hope that's enough to get me started with.

Thanks

Ryan