What is the answer? - Special Offer

Hello

Well.. a week and a half into the blog and I'm pleased to say I have 2 visitors... yes.. 2. Out of the estimated 1 billion online users. I'm just hoping that that 2 wasn't actually just one person visiting twice. Although it would be good to have a repeat visitor! 

So I've decided I need to give some incentives... as well as do some marketing. 

SPECIAL OFFER!!!!

Yes, be the first to comment on ANY of the posts and you get to ask a question. Any question you like. I'll go away, think about it, research it and post what I've thought up. Try not to waste the offer on something rubbish like "Why don't you go and shove your head up your ass?" Clearly given the muscular flexibility of the male body it's impossible. However it is interesting to note that you can actually stick someone else's head up your ass. Ass muscles are extremely flexible. .... i've heard! ;-)

Don't worry if you aren't the first person, come up with an interesting enough quesiton and I'll probaby research that too out of pure curiosity and boredom! 

How many types of friend do you have?

Hello

I think social networking was invented by someone like me. Who likes the idea of having lots of friends, but tihnks it could be more 'efficient'. Sorry, that does make me sound cold. But I'm really not. I'm someone who strongly believes in best friends.  I have a small network of very close friends. But then a have a big network of not so close friends. 

Maintaining 'not so close' friendships is difficult and time consuming. Very inefficient. After all there's a reason you like and want to be friends with them, but there's also a reason they aren't 'best friends'. This can be for any number of reasons, let me know if any of these ring a bell with your friend network?

Work friends - It's good to have someone you can confide in about work things, someone who you know has your back. But work life doesn't nesessarily translate well into your private life. There are typically thing you don't want getting out at work! (Especailly if your friend is your boss!)

Long Distance Friends - Oh, gone are the days you could phone them up at 5 and be in be pub at 6 for a night on the town. These are friends that through pure circumstances no longer live near you and you start to fall behind on their every day activities. You can't be there when they're low and they can't be there for you when you are. Although neither party typically wants it to happen, the friendship inevitibly drifts.

Friends that fell in love - In my experience this is the most painful type of friendship. Someone who you're really close to, get on well with and increasingly seems to spend time with suddenly announces they are in love with you. Telling a friend that you don't feel that way is very hard. It's also hard to know that if such a thing were to happen to that firend you'd normally be the person they talk to, but now your the problem not the solution. The awkwardness of this situaiton makes it almost inevitable that the friendship won't last. 

Friends that just aren't that into you - You think they live such facinating lives, they always know what to do. You look up to them as a role model of how you should be. But they keep cancelling on you and you found out they went out with loads of people and didn't invite you. Yes, you're friend just isn't that into you. As happens in relationships, this can happen in friendships too. It's a shame, but it's inevitable. These are typically the friends you aren't too close to but for years to come you'll wonder 'what did I do wrong?' 'did I drive them away?' 'maybe I should have texted/called them more?"

Desperate Friends 

 This is my second most annoying type of friend. The type of person that's happy to buy you things, drinks, tickets etc. They phone you on a regular basis and are always making plans for you to go out. (I know I havent gotten to the annoying bit yet.. bare with me). - I've had to split this up into subcatagories

It's all about THEM friends - These are the types of people who, when you do spend time with them spend ALL of it talking about themselves. Typical conversations that are repeated over and over and over until you want to tear out your eyes and ears. If you've ever thought "FFS Just break up with them, they're bad news! They were bad news when you first got together 2 years ago, they're still bad news now. AHHHH!!! Why ask for advice if you aren't going to listen to it!!!" I have the utmost sympathy for anyone with a friend like this. In other respects they may be great, but when you start having dark thoughts about hurting them if they bring it up again, it's probably a good idea that you don't spend too much time with them.

"I just want to spend time with you" friend - The type of firend that doesn't really have anything to SAY about themselves and starts pointless conversations all the time. If they've asked you the same question 3 times in a single conversation and won't get off the phone even when the conversation died 20 minutes ago. These are desperate friends. I feel sorry for this type of friend because they clearly need something, but won't really talk about it. Push too hard to try and find out the reason and you get the "I just want to spend time with you, what's wrong with that?" This type of friend typically doesn't want to go out much or do anything exciting together, they just want to 'hang out' all the time and talk about... nothing. It's very difficult to breathe live into these friendships so again you start to distance yourself. (Yes, drifting from this type is very hard, it's more a crowbar you need to get them off! Unfortunately you usually loose them as a friend in the process)

Friends from the past - You were once, bet buds and they always knew what you were thinking. But both you and your friend have grown up a bit. Interests have changed, you've both moved on with your lives. But when you do get together you can't think of any reason why you don't spend more time with each other. But then you don't see each other for 6 months or so, cos of work or family, or relationships. These are the 'lost friends'. I miss these friends the most. It seems that fate has pulled you in two very differant directions and the gap seems to keep getting bigger every time you see them. 

Ex boy/girl friends - "Promise me, we'll always be friends" or "Can't we just be friends" are two of the biggest 'miss sell' of any friendships. You like to think you won't loose that person just because you aren't dating. After all they still mean a lot to you. But it's never the same after the break up. All the fun memories, the occasional surpressed sexual tension, the hole you feel in the pit of your stomach when they start dating someone else. Even with the best of intentions friendships with ex's rarely work out. And they NEVER work out if you try and be friends straight after the break up. You need a good couple of years apart if this type of friendship is going to stand any chance at all. 

The 'Not really friends' friends - We've all got loads of these. People who hang out in the same group as your friends. Someone who you always say hi to and small talk them. But really you know very little about them and for some reason you just haven't 'clicked' but they're friends with your friends, so they become friends by default. This is an odd friend group, you go to their birthday because all you other friends are going, but you just have no idea what to get them as a pressie because you don't really know them. This is a difficult dilema as if getting vouchers might as well be the same thing as wearing a t-shirt saying "Don't know who the f&^k you are, but I heard there's free beer?"

Aww.. this post has really brought back a lot of memories, good and bad. That's all the types I can think if at the moment. Will update if I can think of more. Add a comment if you can think of any more? 

Starship Troopers - A shocking prediction of the future?

Hello

I watched Starship Troopers earlier and I was quite surprised how many similarities the film had with events that have taken place since the film was made. Is the story so sucessful because it deals with what would happen when a society is threatened. Is it because the film was based on the book of a writer who's inspiration was the experiences he had during the second world war and history is doomed to repeat itself? Life imitates art as it where, but in this sci-fi film which is seemingly so abstract from reality were they able to show something true about the human condition. 

Similarities

Patriotism

Film: Youth being taught a strong patriotic bond. That there should be almost blind alligence with their society.

Reality: Patriotism has always played a major role in American society. It was really nesessary for a country that was such a melting pot of so many immigrants that people held alligence to America, rather than their countries of origin. Whilst times may have changed, this hasn't. As shown during the many debates about whether the presidential candidates were seen to be 'patriotic enough to be president' http://www.columbiamissourian.com/stories/2008/07/15/patriotism-shouldnt-be-questioned-just-taught/

Military Glorification

Film: "I'm doing my part. Service guarentees citizenship. Would you like to know more?"

The film clearly shows the wonder with which the new recruits look upto the all powerful military and quite literally put their lives in it's hands. 

Reality: The US military has a very active publicity machine designed to boost faith (and 'faith') in the military. In a democracy this is an important thing for a military to do as they need to 'justify' their budgets and support for the military often gives political cover. (Just been reading exerts of this (http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=zB8J2ho-0k8C&pg=PA32&lpg=PA32&dq=Guts+and+Glory:+The+Making+of+the+American+Military+Image+in+Film+synopsis&source=bl&ots=7YXQg6KNmV&sig=TOVBIM2x5PhZQlrmpo0kDg67QMc&hl=en&ei=5lK4Sf2XDtnHjAeMqJmcCQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=1&ct=result#PPR11-IA1,M1) 

"To the extent that the book has a thesis, it postulates that hollywood's creation image of the all-powerful, always victorious armed services through the late 1950's contributed to the ease with which Lyndon Johnson and the best and brightest people in government tok the United States int othe quagmire of Vietnam." 

The book not only explains the motivation of some to glorify the military in America but also the effects this glorification can have, positive and negative. How it can pursuade people of the military's invincibility, strength and urgent purpose of it. 

BUT.... Yes. But of course these are common aspects of American society. Get to the future bit! 

ok! 

A Society Attacked

Film: The film shows that an enemy known, but thought to not be a huge threat (Arachnids) are able to launch a massive and devistating attack on Buenas Aries. The routine of peoples lives and training camp exercies suspended as everyone is glued to the news to see this attack. Revenge, anger and loss are all clearly viewable and commented on in the news article. So, what is such a society to do? War. 

Reality: You probably know where I'm going with this. You probably remember where you were the day it happened. September 11th. Burn't into all our minds as a great turning point. When we all suddenly felt so vulnerable, angry and vengeful after the terrorist attacks. Just starring at the 24 hour news channels watching the flames and smoke billowing out of the World Trade Centre. It didn't take long for the news to speculate the guilt and start discussing what a suitable response would be. It wasn't long before we all started learning about Afghanistan. I'd barely heard of it before and I certainly couldn't place it on a map. But something 'had' to be done. There would be a 'war on terror'. But it wasn't clear where on the map this war would be.

Knee Jerk Invasion

Film: Very quickly it seems an invasion is planned and launched against Klendathu (sp?). The decisions are based on the societies pre-existing assumptions of the enemy. Assuming that the insects possessed no actual intelligence and that stopping them would be like stepping on a cockroach.

Reality: Whilst everyone got all 'gun-ho' on revenge, a quickly formed alliance started the invasion of Afghanistan. It's fair to say that there wasn't really time to prepare, ensure that training was given on how to handle combat in rocky environments. Equipment shortages were common and a dreadful lack of interpreters lead to breakdowns in communication with locals. But of course the thinking at the time was that we would capture and hold Afghanistan very quickly.

The West would like to see a short, sharp war resulting in the vaporising of the Taliban followed by a quick transition to a regime the West could live with, while grateful Afghan civilians applaud joyously from the sidelines.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/invasion-by-infidels-will-turn-taliban-into-heroes-670125.html

Just need to quote the chilling last sentence

However truly terrible the consequences, many will happily rally behind the flag.

It's not like no one suspected. But no one listened. 

"To fight the bug we must understand the bug"

Film: In the film after the failure of the invasion and the clear misjudgement over the enemy, the leader in charge resigns.

Reality: If only this bit followed the film. If only. Unfortunately it would be another 6 years before the leader that started the invasion would leave.

Also both in the film and in reality numbers of dead seem so abstract. We can't process in our minds the sheer numbers of people who died or were injured.  When it started we'd get pages showing the photo's of those killed.. then they stopped doing that. In the film you have the screen with all the names running up, the total at the top over 326,000. 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/mar/11/afghanistan.unitednations

Brains of the operation in a cave.

Film: In the film they identify the leader 'brain' bug who's been co-ordinating the mindless arachnids to devastating effects. The specialist skill of the brain bug is less brain washing, more brain sucking. The brain bug is hiding in a complex network of caves and is captured! 

Reality: Of course there was clearly a brain behind the organisation, a face and a name, now known by pretty much every man woman and child on the planet. Osama bin Ladin. He two was hiding in caves, opting to brain wash rather than suck. Building and co-ordinating his terror network. Unfortunately again reality didn't quite measure up to the film and we didn't capture the brain bug. In fact he's still alive and free... somewhere. 

SO... Did they predict the future?

No, I'm afraid not. It comes down to this. "Those who don't learn from history are destined to repeat it." The film is closely based on key world war two events and references with some creative license thrown in for good measure. The big unprovoked attack being Perl Harbour. The invasion, a variation of D-Day, or the landing in Italy, or probably the failure of Operation Market Garden. 

The film is based on sound sociological and psychological reactions, because he saw it happen. Unfortunately we didn't entirely learn from our mistakes. The same or similar mistakes made in the Second World War, Vietnam, Korea, Falkland islands and many more.  

So the REAL question is. When will it happen again?  How long will it take us to forget these things again? After all the true power of terrorism is it's ability to control what we do, move us away from rational thought where we learn and improve and put us in state where knee jerk reactions seem the only rational option. 

What do you think? Be the first to comment on this blog! 

"Haven't WE got kids?"

More of a follow on to my last post. I spotted this and thought I would share.

What is a Father?

Hello

Well, there's the obvious answer. A man who generates sperm which inseminate an egg. That's pretty undisputed. 

What is disputed is what should happen next. Is that it? Or should a father mean something more?  

If your father is little more than a sperm donor. What do you owe them? What do they owe you? 

Now I like difficult quesitons, but I've been struggling with these for a number of years and here's where I stand. 

Men have a responsibility for their sperm. If they decide to have unprotected sex then they are accountable for the consequences.  Granted mistakes happen, but then there are a number of measures to prevent these mistakes becoming a life long commitment. So if a couple decide not to correct their mistakes they are making a concious decision to commit to the child. Aren't they? 

Now, I'm quite surprised what a sensitive issue this is as public debates on this issue nearly always seem to devolve into a discussion of "why can't we have single mum's?"and "If the father is a bad person, then the moter has the right to end the relationship". I agree. I don't see there being a problem with either of these. But my question relates more to the father. Why doesn't the father see it as their responsiblity to not be a bad person? Even if the mother and father aren't together why do some fathers think that gets them 'off the hook' as it where and they don't have to care for their kids? 

I love this article. I think it really sums up the crisis of fatherhood society is generating and points out that what we think of as a 'traditional family' isn't so traditional after all!

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1630551,00.html

I find this article facinating as it draws the links between the psychology of the parents and the impacts if has on the children " father-child interactions appear to be central to the development of a child's ability to maintain strong, fulfilling social relationships later in life."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-19960501-000041.html

This answer to distant fathers is also quite interesting. 

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_do_children_of_emotionally_distant_fathers_cope_with_their_emotions_and_move_on_to_lead_productive_happy_lives

I'ms getting a little off track... what is a father. Well.. whislt these studies do point out that it's easier for fathers to disconnect emotionally and remove themselves from parenting. I can't help but feel that a REAL father wouldn't. Regardless of the situation. I like the comment "The bottom line is, it's not up to the children to deal with this (parental problems), but either the two parents should grow up and try themselves to deal with their problems." 

There really is a debt of responsibility on the father. A debt that society as a whole tends to let slip. There doesn't seem to be the support structures or role models or even social pressure to be a good father these days. But this isn't a social issue really. I think it's more down to the concions of father. It shouldn't be down to society to 'ok' detatchment from the child. The father should see it as their duty to protect and nurture. Whether that's in a relationship with the mother or not. That's not really the important bit. The important bit is being their for the child. 

What do you think a father is? Or should be? Would you be like your father? 

Is this the start of a New Fascism?

Hey

It's become quite a social fact that after a war society tends to move towards the political left. We beleive we're fighting for something good and just and we want that to be reflected in the way we live our lives. 

Equally during times of economic hardship we tend to move to the political right. We feel insecure and defensive. We tend to revert to tribalism, (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tribalism) strengthening our bonds and social identity with specific groups of individuals we can relate to. This can take many differant paths but in recent history the most notable is the national darwinistic approach (or fascism). 

Technically speaking this is Neo-Tribalism "as the culture and institutions of modernism declined, societies would look to the organizational principles of the distant past for guidance"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neo-Tribalism

And of course you also get an increase in religious tribalism

http://www.sociologyguide.com/types-of-society/Characteristics-of-Tribal-Society.php 

It's happened before

1920's Cabaret

Yes, you're probably wondering what on earth this has to do with anything. Well, you're probably familiar with the first and second world wars and you've probably seen loads of films about them. But have you ever really looked into what happened inbetween them in Germany? How did they really go from a defeated and financially ruined country to the biggest threat in Europe in a relatively short period of time? It certainly wasn't a straight line and like much of the world the 1920's was a golden era of liberalism and technological advancement. The cabaret became the blogosphere of it's time with a politics, satire and social debate at the heart of many events (and of course sex at the others, just like the blogosphere :-) ). 

http://instruct1.cit.cornell.edu/courses/his452/Alcohol/germancabaret.html

Social acceptance of homosexuality

I think this message really captulates just how quickly a society can move to the right and truely catch people out with devistating consequences. 

http://www.qrd.org/qrd/culture/1995/gay.culture.flourished.prenazi.germany-10.95

Key factors

More than ever in my life time society as a whole seems to be reaching out for something. We seem confused about where we go from here. What will global warming mean? what does globalisation mean? What's happening with the economy? Who am I? Where do I fit into society. So more people than ever feel lonely. There are few families with a stable social status and people are much more likely to move to new areas for work. So social bonds aren't that strong right now. Combined with economic hardship and a lack of credible role models it's possible for a strong leader to come to power that will provide a structure and hope that we so desperately need.

Are there signs already?

You may have heard on the new 'British jobs for British workers' not to mention calls for a more'values' driven society over the 13 year old father controversy. 

It couldn't happen now

Yes, standard response, but I can't help thinking if you'd of asked all the financial experts in the world just 3-5 years ago whether we could see another depression I bet they would have said something along the lines of "No, it's not possible, lessons were learn't from the great depression, society and financial models have moved on." Ask them now and they'll tell you there were lots of warning signs that were ignored. The news makes it sound like we were 'obviously' heading for trouble, why did no one realise? 

So my question to you is really, what happens after a financial collapse? What is stopping a repeat of history?

Is Obama the one to unite a strong left and provide the security and answers we need without is reverting to the hard line traditional instincts on the right? 

(Plan to post again with what I think the 'New Fascism' might look like. But feel free to comment on your views. Am I mad?)

The genius of StumbleUpon

Hi

I don't have a TV. People think I'm mad. How can anyone possibly cope without TV they tell me... You'd miss out on so much. Not really most TV is available online so I can watch what I want and when I want to. I can skip the adverts and the ever longer intros and "previously on...." 

You see, I used to have a problem.. a big problem. I would turn on the TV all the time and if there wasn't anything I liked on I would just channel surf flicking from one thing to the next. Or I'd be half way through a program and the adverts come on so I start channel surfing again. 

Channel surfing is great. With 40 odd channels you never know what you'll find on the other side and whilst you're watching boring channels on this one you could be missing a good show on the other one. 

Whilst I don't have this problem with TV anymore I do with websites. One of the BIG draw backs on the Internet so far has been you need to have a reasonable idea of what you want to see and you search for it. The number of times I've typed 'I'm bored' into Google only to come back with absolute rubbish is quite sad...... UNTIL StumbleUpon came along. 

StumbleUpon is like having a 'next channel' button, but for websites. Get bored reading a blog... what else is online 'click'. Oh... musical Horses. 5 mins later. Bored 'click' a dissection of the human brain... 'click' how to take over your country in 5 years... interesting.. 

Therefore I really recommend you get StumbleUpon http://www.stumbleupon.com/ The only BIG flaw I've found is it doesn't work in Chrome (yet). So I have to use my (now seemingly obsolete IE.)

Try Stumble. Trust me! 

Until next time